No, this isn't a blog about the different types of bait used for fishing, although you got your westend snapper dry, gotzur hamble, louandis, anijule and the like, but no one wants to read made-up words. No, this is a bait on a much grander scale...
So you are at the local watering hole, chatting to a foxy young thing. Things are going swell, but you want to invite her back to your place, without looking desperate, and well, obvious that you want a sexy time with her. What you need is some sort of bait, to invite her back to look at, and then make your deadly move! Well, actually, that isn't the best metaphor, let's just say, to make your move.
I bet $100,000 you are thinking "Gee-wiz The One They Call Anthony, what on earth can I use as bait to reel this girl in?" I am so glad you asked, as there is a few items which are of use.
Slot Machine - This is a fun object to mention, because who really just keeps a slot machine in their house.
Trampoline - Now, while these are fun, they can also be dangerous, but it does provide a little extra, ermm, bounce.
Tea-Cup Pig - This is a very helpful one, as it is a pig, the size of a tea-cup, which is so cute and girls just can't resist cute little animals!
Simba - Yes, the Simba. All you need to do is adopt a lion cub, train it, and keep it. Now for the big set up, you want to set the mood so you put on 'The Circle of Life' on your boombox. You then stand up on your table, and hold your lion cub up in the air!
Castle Made Out of Toilet Paper - This is so cool, the girl will forget it is actually made out of toilet paper rolls. You can play the knight and princess, or witches and warlocks and other cool games.
Snow Globe Collection - While this may appear to be, well, dumb at first thought, let it sink in over time and the girl will realise it just may be the shake up she needed.
So there are some baits you can use. Just remember, it needs to be fun, but not too fun to take her mind of you. You brought her over to see this 'bait', but it is up to you to finish the job by reeling her in, gutting her, and eating her after cooking her on the barbie..... Wait! Woah! Let's re-do this, relating the girl to a fish isn't working out so well ay. Just, uhh, yeah, bait her and reel her in....
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Rich Inventions 01
Taking inspiration from Horgs Inventions on Hamish & Andy, I've decided to share a invention, or more so, a business idea, which would make me rich, and any potential investors. So if you do wish to invest in this idea, let me know, and we will get this underway.
Rich Inventions 01 - Messy Restaurant
Okay, so this idea developed after talking to a friend about restaurant experiences, and then the idea came to me. What if you went to a restaurant, where the chef cooks the food right in front of you, but also, throws the food at you while you eat? Don't you think it would be a fun dining experience.
So you pay say, $25-30 per head, and you are given a big plastic cover thingy to put over your clothes, to avoid them getting too dirty. A waiter comes and takes your order, you sit at a bench which has cook tops, sinks, and stuff, and you are within arms-reach of the chef, preparing and cooking your food.
After cooking the meal, the chef also cooks a little extra, and while you are eating, he throws it at you! The best food for the chef to throw would be spaghetti of course, as it's messy, and fun to throw, but throwing a parmy, or steak, or really anything. So the restaurant would basically erupts into a giant food fight, and you are paying to participate and have fun.
At the end of the meal, you can decide whether to keep the plastic protector as a souvenir, but to keep it, you have to pay an extra $5, or you can give it back, and it would go on the wall in a frame with your name, and dinner choice.
Now I can't think of any negatives about this idea, and if you can, I'd love to hear it. Got any questions, feel free to ask, and I will answer. If you want to invest, just send a cheque out to me.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Rich Inventions 01 - Messy Restaurant
Okay, so this idea developed after talking to a friend about restaurant experiences, and then the idea came to me. What if you went to a restaurant, where the chef cooks the food right in front of you, but also, throws the food at you while you eat? Don't you think it would be a fun dining experience.
So you pay say, $25-30 per head, and you are given a big plastic cover thingy to put over your clothes, to avoid them getting too dirty. A waiter comes and takes your order, you sit at a bench which has cook tops, sinks, and stuff, and you are within arms-reach of the chef, preparing and cooking your food.
After cooking the meal, the chef also cooks a little extra, and while you are eating, he throws it at you! The best food for the chef to throw would be spaghetti of course, as it's messy, and fun to throw, but throwing a parmy, or steak, or really anything. So the restaurant would basically erupts into a giant food fight, and you are paying to participate and have fun.
At the end of the meal, you can decide whether to keep the plastic protector as a souvenir, but to keep it, you have to pay an extra $5, or you can give it back, and it would go on the wall in a frame with your name, and dinner choice.
Now I can't think of any negatives about this idea, and if you can, I'd love to hear it. Got any questions, feel free to ask, and I will answer. If you want to invest, just send a cheque out to me.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
This One Goes Out To My Fan
Taking a break from my pre-season training blog to write a personal message to all my fans, or most likely, my fan. I hope you enjoy reading this blog as much as I enjoy writing it. I really, really enjoy writing it, so in return, that must mean you really, really enjoy reading it.
I want this blog to be not only about me and my thoughts, but also a blog of the people. So if you, my fan, have something you want me to talk about, whether it's about a hot current news event, or perhaps maybe there is something you want to know about me, or maybe you want to know the difference between affect and effect, just shoot me a message, either via facey or on here.
I am humble to have you as a fan, and I greatly appreciate the time you take out of your day to read it. I will continue to provide you with quality blogs, which are informative, funny, and well, awesome!
Well I best finish this up, and publish it, so you, as my fan, can have the pleasure of reading it.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
I want this blog to be not only about me and my thoughts, but also a blog of the people. So if you, my fan, have something you want me to talk about, whether it's about a hot current news event, or perhaps maybe there is something you want to know about me, or maybe you want to know the difference between affect and effect, just shoot me a message, either via facey or on here.
I am humble to have you as a fan, and I greatly appreciate the time you take out of your day to read it. I will continue to provide you with quality blogs, which are informative, funny, and well, awesome!
Well I best finish this up, and publish it, so you, as my fan, can have the pleasure of reading it.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Planning Pre-Season Training, Part 1
With most country football leagues now finished up, and Silly Sundays, Mad Mondays, Tacky Tuesdays, Wacky Wednesday, etc etc are now drawing to an end, pre-season is just around the corner for some, for others, it's off is the very distant future. However, if you are serious about your game, and want to be fit for the 2011 season, keep reading.
Those who know me, or read some of my blog, you would know I had a strong passion to be a personal trainer/strength and conditioning coach. During this time, I studied up on programs, exercises and diets, mostly based on sport training, so I feel like I can pass on some of this knowledge to you.
You won't be seeing any actually programs on here, because, what works for one person, doesn't mean it will work for the next. So I could write out this great program, and you might see great results, but Bill or Frank might not improve a single bit. Training programs have to be taliored to your current fitness, goals and schedule. I will cover some of these, but to save posting a monster long blog, I will break it up into parts.
Part 1, Rest and Off-Season
Part 2, Pre-Season Testing
Part 3, Pre-Season Programming
Part 4, If I Forgot Anything
PART 1, REST AND OFF-SEASON
With the season over, your body needs to rest and recover after the brutual season it took. This is also a good time to see the physio about any niggling injuries, or rest any sore spots, as this will be your big pre-season.
Usually, the off-season is regarded as the time when the athlete aims to gain strength and mass. If you consider yourself a 'big boy' and think you should focus on cardio, try and put them thoughts aside, as below I will guide you through an off-season that will build up strength and help shed some of that fat.
The off-season on average, runs from October to the start of December, so about 3 months, 2 if stretched for time. So in this time, don't expect to see huge gains, like an increase of 50kg on your bench! This is the time to slowly (so you don't injure yourself) develop functional strength and help build a base for the pre-season.
First thing to take care of is to test your current strength and endurance. So below are a couple tests which can help.
Bench Press 1RM - Build up and see how much you can bench press for 1 rep.
Squat 1RM - Same as Bench press, but with a Squat.
Deadlift 1RM - Same as above, but for a deadlift.
2km Bike Sprint - On a exercise bike, time how long it takes to ride 2km.
100m Sprint - Mark out 100m on the oval, straight line, and time how fast you run it in.
Push-ups In 2 Minutes - See how many push-ups you can rep for in the space of 2 minutes.
Crunches In 2 Minutes - Same as above, but for crunches.
These tests will help determine where you are at physically, and when undertaking the benchpress and squat, always have 1 or 2 friends spotting you incase you fatigue and can't complete the rest. In fact, whenever working out and aiming to beat your PB, always have a spotter, we don't need injuries in the off-season.
Another thing before I lay out some off-season program principles, don't try and do too much! If you know you can only benchpress 60kg, the next week don't aim to bench 80kg, that is only asking for trouble. When you walk into the gym, whether its a big flashy commerical one, or a dusty bench in your mate's shed, leave your ego at the door.
If you are unsure on any exercises, youtube them! Don't rely on pictures in Google Images, actually see how the movement occurs, and look for key points. If need be, get someone to tape you performing the exercise and compare it. This might appear silly, but perfect form is needed, especially when deadlifting and squatting.
So I think I got the basics covered, and to avoid you sueing me, I made sure to tell you to not overdo it and watch your form. So now, let's see how to set-up a off-season program.
After you have tested yourself, you need to set out some realistic goals. What do you want to achieve over the off-season? And if your only goal is to increase your benchpress, please stop reading, because the squat and deadlift are far more important exercises.
The next major factor is, how many days a week can you workout? Someone who can work out 4 days a week needs a different program compared to someone who can only squeeze in 2 days. But for the case of this programming, let's say you are able to workout 3 days a week. Which in fact, is plenty of time.
As previously mentioned, the key outcome desired at the end of off-season is increased strength, so let's make that our goal. Now, this is where sets and reps become key focual point in your workout, as they affect how your body reacts to the workload. Many magazines will tell you, 1-5 rep range is good for strength, 6-10 for muscle mass, 10+ is good for endurance, which is true. So a lot of our sets will only go to 5 reps, apart from one exercise.
Less is more, and this is what your off-season weights program will be. It will contain minimal number of exercises, low reps, mid range of sets, but high weights (realitive to your strength of course). Okay, now let's just get into it, enough yack, let's get a program going.
You want to make sure you warm up for 5 minutes before each workout, this helps increase blood flow, prepares the body for what is about to happen, and keeps you loose and warm. And it is always key, KEY, the first exercise you do, do 2 light warm-up sets.
The first exercise of your program is your bread-and-butter. This will be the big exercise, and the choice of exercise is crucial. You want a exercise that activates as much muscle as possible, to promote the most strength gains. You would always choose one from The Big 3, Bench Press, Squat and Deadlift. These exercises use mutiple muscles, with deadlift being the most effective, but a variation of the squat, a Box Squat, is also effective.
What I forgot to mention earlier is, these workouts are regarded as full-body workouts. Which means, you focus on working your body out as a whole, and not focus on 1 or 2 muscle groups. A typical bodybuilding weekly schedule may go like
Monday - Chest and Triceps
Wednesday - Back and Biceps
Fridays - Legs
Us, being athletes, will be like
Monday - Full-body
Wednesday - Full-body
Friday - Full-body
So, let's say we chose the Squat as our main exercise, what we want to do is warm the body up with 2 light sets, then chuck on the plates. Last year I experimented with doing 5 sets, with the first set being 5 reps, then increased the weight a little, next set 4 reps, next set 3 reps, and so on, til i did 1 set of 1, with most weight. I also tried where i did 2 sets of 5 reps, 1 set of 3 reps, 1 set of 1 (at my most maximum weight), than the last set, back at 5 reps with the original weight. These seemed to work out good, and with the weight increase, a simple 2.5kg each side will add up at the end, first week or two, no need to rush, you are finding out where you are at.
The next exercise will generally work the other part of the body, so if you did squats as your first exercise, a good second exercise would be a upper-body, if you benched as your first, lower-body for your second. This exercise, the set and reps will be about 3-4 sets of 5 reps, at a increasing weight each set. But, you aren't increasing it by alot, or decreasing the reps each set. The purpose of this exercise is to help build the other part of your body, without taxing your body too much. Your first exercise is meant to be the big one, which tax you, the next couple are just complimenting it. Below are a list of exercises which are good (B t w, no machines allowed, only free weights, will explain later)
Upper-body
Row (barbell, dumbell, one-arm, whatever tickles you, but no machines)
Pull-up/chin-up
Overhead shoulder press
Dumbbell benchpress
Floor press
Weighted push-ups (close grip is also good here)
Lower-body
Lunge
Step-up
Dumbbell squat
Box Squat (dumbbell or barbell)
Weighted back extension
Now you are probably thinking, "Hey, what about the guns man, I wanna work my guns!" News for you, we are not going to single out the bicep or tricep during the off-season. Once you start working out, doing only a few big exercises, you will notice that your biceps and triceps will get a big workout, without directly working them. Rowing motions, and pull-ups, will not only work your back, but also your biceps. While benching is working your chest, shoulders and triceps.
Your third and final exercise, you choose one from the list above, but you lower the weight and increase the reps. So you are looking at 3-4 sets, at 6-8 reps at a slightly lower weight. By now you will nearing wrecked, so this is to just engage a little more muscle.
Now, rest between sets are important, as if you don't rest enough, your next set will suffer and you won't get the desire. However, rest too long and you lose focus and the 'warmed up' feeling. If you rest about 2 minutes between each set on your first exercise, and then 1 minute between sets on the other two, then that should be fine.
So your workout should basically look like this,
Exercise 1, Upper Body, 5 sets, 5 reps/4 reps/3 reps/2 reps/1 rep (at increasing weight)
or, 5 sets, 2 sets of 5 reps, 1 set of 3 reps, 1 set of 1 rep, 1 set of 5 reps
Exercise 2, Lower Body, 5 sets of 5 reps
Exercise 3, Upper-body, 3-4 sets of 6-8 reps
OR
Exercise 1, Lower Body,
Exercise 2, Upper Body
Exercise 3, Lower Body
Aim to alternate this, so one workout start out with the upper body being the main, then next workout, lower body as the main, and so on.
Now I was hoping to not make these blogs so long, but this is being quite a long one. So I'm going to end this now, and pick up on it in the morning, or late afternoon. So what we are going to learn in the next blog is, diet during the off-season and some more on weight training.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Those who know me, or read some of my blog, you would know I had a strong passion to be a personal trainer/strength and conditioning coach. During this time, I studied up on programs, exercises and diets, mostly based on sport training, so I feel like I can pass on some of this knowledge to you.
You won't be seeing any actually programs on here, because, what works for one person, doesn't mean it will work for the next. So I could write out this great program, and you might see great results, but Bill or Frank might not improve a single bit. Training programs have to be taliored to your current fitness, goals and schedule. I will cover some of these, but to save posting a monster long blog, I will break it up into parts.
Part 1, Rest and Off-Season
Part 2, Pre-Season Testing
Part 3, Pre-Season Programming
Part 4, If I Forgot Anything
PART 1, REST AND OFF-SEASON
With the season over, your body needs to rest and recover after the brutual season it took. This is also a good time to see the physio about any niggling injuries, or rest any sore spots, as this will be your big pre-season.
Usually, the off-season is regarded as the time when the athlete aims to gain strength and mass. If you consider yourself a 'big boy' and think you should focus on cardio, try and put them thoughts aside, as below I will guide you through an off-season that will build up strength and help shed some of that fat.
The off-season on average, runs from October to the start of December, so about 3 months, 2 if stretched for time. So in this time, don't expect to see huge gains, like an increase of 50kg on your bench! This is the time to slowly (so you don't injure yourself) develop functional strength and help build a base for the pre-season.
First thing to take care of is to test your current strength and endurance. So below are a couple tests which can help.
Bench Press 1RM - Build up and see how much you can bench press for 1 rep.
Squat 1RM - Same as Bench press, but with a Squat.
Deadlift 1RM - Same as above, but for a deadlift.
2km Bike Sprint - On a exercise bike, time how long it takes to ride 2km.
100m Sprint - Mark out 100m on the oval, straight line, and time how fast you run it in.
Push-ups In 2 Minutes - See how many push-ups you can rep for in the space of 2 minutes.
Crunches In 2 Minutes - Same as above, but for crunches.
These tests will help determine where you are at physically, and when undertaking the benchpress and squat, always have 1 or 2 friends spotting you incase you fatigue and can't complete the rest. In fact, whenever working out and aiming to beat your PB, always have a spotter, we don't need injuries in the off-season.
Another thing before I lay out some off-season program principles, don't try and do too much! If you know you can only benchpress 60kg, the next week don't aim to bench 80kg, that is only asking for trouble. When you walk into the gym, whether its a big flashy commerical one, or a dusty bench in your mate's shed, leave your ego at the door.
If you are unsure on any exercises, youtube them! Don't rely on pictures in Google Images, actually see how the movement occurs, and look for key points. If need be, get someone to tape you performing the exercise and compare it. This might appear silly, but perfect form is needed, especially when deadlifting and squatting.
So I think I got the basics covered, and to avoid you sueing me, I made sure to tell you to not overdo it and watch your form. So now, let's see how to set-up a off-season program.
After you have tested yourself, you need to set out some realistic goals. What do you want to achieve over the off-season? And if your only goal is to increase your benchpress, please stop reading, because the squat and deadlift are far more important exercises.
The next major factor is, how many days a week can you workout? Someone who can work out 4 days a week needs a different program compared to someone who can only squeeze in 2 days. But for the case of this programming, let's say you are able to workout 3 days a week. Which in fact, is plenty of time.
As previously mentioned, the key outcome desired at the end of off-season is increased strength, so let's make that our goal. Now, this is where sets and reps become key focual point in your workout, as they affect how your body reacts to the workload. Many magazines will tell you, 1-5 rep range is good for strength, 6-10 for muscle mass, 10+ is good for endurance, which is true. So a lot of our sets will only go to 5 reps, apart from one exercise.
Less is more, and this is what your off-season weights program will be. It will contain minimal number of exercises, low reps, mid range of sets, but high weights (realitive to your strength of course). Okay, now let's just get into it, enough yack, let's get a program going.
You want to make sure you warm up for 5 minutes before each workout, this helps increase blood flow, prepares the body for what is about to happen, and keeps you loose and warm. And it is always key, KEY, the first exercise you do, do 2 light warm-up sets.
The first exercise of your program is your bread-and-butter. This will be the big exercise, and the choice of exercise is crucial. You want a exercise that activates as much muscle as possible, to promote the most strength gains. You would always choose one from The Big 3, Bench Press, Squat and Deadlift. These exercises use mutiple muscles, with deadlift being the most effective, but a variation of the squat, a Box Squat, is also effective.
What I forgot to mention earlier is, these workouts are regarded as full-body workouts. Which means, you focus on working your body out as a whole, and not focus on 1 or 2 muscle groups. A typical bodybuilding weekly schedule may go like
Monday - Chest and Triceps
Wednesday - Back and Biceps
Fridays - Legs
Us, being athletes, will be like
Monday - Full-body
Wednesday - Full-body
Friday - Full-body
So, let's say we chose the Squat as our main exercise, what we want to do is warm the body up with 2 light sets, then chuck on the plates. Last year I experimented with doing 5 sets, with the first set being 5 reps, then increased the weight a little, next set 4 reps, next set 3 reps, and so on, til i did 1 set of 1, with most weight. I also tried where i did 2 sets of 5 reps, 1 set of 3 reps, 1 set of 1 (at my most maximum weight), than the last set, back at 5 reps with the original weight. These seemed to work out good, and with the weight increase, a simple 2.5kg each side will add up at the end, first week or two, no need to rush, you are finding out where you are at.
The next exercise will generally work the other part of the body, so if you did squats as your first exercise, a good second exercise would be a upper-body, if you benched as your first, lower-body for your second. This exercise, the set and reps will be about 3-4 sets of 5 reps, at a increasing weight each set. But, you aren't increasing it by alot, or decreasing the reps each set. The purpose of this exercise is to help build the other part of your body, without taxing your body too much. Your first exercise is meant to be the big one, which tax you, the next couple are just complimenting it. Below are a list of exercises which are good (B t w, no machines allowed, only free weights, will explain later)
Upper-body
Row (barbell, dumbell, one-arm, whatever tickles you, but no machines)
Pull-up/chin-up
Overhead shoulder press
Dumbbell benchpress
Floor press
Weighted push-ups (close grip is also good here)
Lower-body
Lunge
Step-up
Dumbbell squat
Box Squat (dumbbell or barbell)
Weighted back extension
Now you are probably thinking, "Hey, what about the guns man, I wanna work my guns!" News for you, we are not going to single out the bicep or tricep during the off-season. Once you start working out, doing only a few big exercises, you will notice that your biceps and triceps will get a big workout, without directly working them. Rowing motions, and pull-ups, will not only work your back, but also your biceps. While benching is working your chest, shoulders and triceps.
Your third and final exercise, you choose one from the list above, but you lower the weight and increase the reps. So you are looking at 3-4 sets, at 6-8 reps at a slightly lower weight. By now you will nearing wrecked, so this is to just engage a little more muscle.
Now, rest between sets are important, as if you don't rest enough, your next set will suffer and you won't get the desire. However, rest too long and you lose focus and the 'warmed up' feeling. If you rest about 2 minutes between each set on your first exercise, and then 1 minute between sets on the other two, then that should be fine.
So your workout should basically look like this,
Exercise 1, Upper Body, 5 sets, 5 reps/4 reps/3 reps/2 reps/1 rep (at increasing weight)
or, 5 sets, 2 sets of 5 reps, 1 set of 3 reps, 1 set of 1 rep, 1 set of 5 reps
Exercise 2, Lower Body, 5 sets of 5 reps
Exercise 3, Upper-body, 3-4 sets of 6-8 reps
OR
Exercise 1, Lower Body,
Exercise 2, Upper Body
Exercise 3, Lower Body
Aim to alternate this, so one workout start out with the upper body being the main, then next workout, lower body as the main, and so on.
Now I was hoping to not make these blogs so long, but this is being quite a long one. So I'm going to end this now, and pick up on it in the morning, or late afternoon. So what we are going to learn in the next blog is, diet during the off-season and some more on weight training.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Last Saturday In September
With the famous Last Saturday In September only a few days away, I believe now would be a good time to reflect on the last two Grand Finals I have watched, since I will be missing this years due to work commitments.
2008 and 2009 Grand Finals were memorable and enjoyable, and both had a different atmosphere, but created lasting memories. So what I am going to do right now, is go through the days events of each year, sharing what I remember (and don't remember) and maybe a little sook at the end about missing this years.
2008, Hawks V Cats
This Grand Final was a true reflection of that year for me, and what made it a great day was my band-wagoning with the Hawks for the season.
I invited a few close mates over to watch the game at mine, with the original plan being, sit outside with a TV, pool full of ice and drinks, and enjoy the game in the sun. While it sounded good in theory, practical wise, not so successful. Silly me put water in the pool, then ice, so the ice ended up melting and did not keep the drinks cold. The TV did not get good reception, and the direct sunlight caused a glare. However, I was determined and spent the whole morning trying to get it to work, then my brother called me an idiot, and we moved to inside. At the time, I didn't like the idea, but in retrospect, was the better option, as inside provided fridge, 42" high def TV, pool table, couches and air-conditioning.
We all settled in our spots, me, with my Hawks jumper on, and a couple friends with their Cats one on. The opening bounce proved to be a heart stopper, and we were underway, but while the game just started, the drinks were already flowing.
Half-time, and the game was a good'in, which created a great atmosphere. We needed our own half-time entertainment, so this is where the pool table came to be quite handy, so a few games were played, and a few drinks consumed. 99% of the group were getting to the stage of noticing the alcohol effect, while 1% (well actually, just one of us) was drunk before the opening bounce, as someone opened a beer near him and he smelt it, causing him to get drunk.
With the close game underway again, cheers, boos, and abuse was been hurled throughout the room. This wasn't just directed at the TV, but also each other, which caused me to have a blood nose during the 4th quarter. With about 15 minutes left in the final, Hawks were in front and looking strong, so I confidently downloaded the Hawks club song and started playing it with 10minutes to go. My brother told me to turn it off, as anything could happen. Fast forward 10minutes and I played it again! Being drunk at this time, I rang every Hawk supporter in my phone, which was like 1 or 2 I think, and cheered and sung with them.
With excitement running through my veins, I ran up to the local pub, burst through the door, jumped over the bar and hugged the publican (being a mad Hawk supporter). I then made my disappearance back to the house, where I cooled and calmed myself by jumping in my inflatable. So in the end, it turned out to be a handy device.
With all of us still wanting to party, we thought the most fitting place to do it would be the Mulwala Ski Club, or the Skibi as we like to call it. So we got our sober friend, well, my sister-in-law to drive a car load of us over to Mul. First stop was dinner, which was Maccas, and it turned out to be Cyril. Second stop was the Skibi, where we drank, carried on, and cheered. By the end of the night my jumper was taken by a Hawks fan, and I never did get it back.
Once the Skibi closed, we headed to our usual spot, RickyD's, grabbed ourselves a pizza, and headed to a mate's place to sleep it off.
Next morning, we were picked up, taken back to Oaklands, where many hours of rest occurred, and the excitement of the Grand Final subsided. But boy, it was a great day/night.
2009, Cats V Saints
This Grand Final was a special one, with the main one being, it was my mate's 21st birthday party, so I had to party hard for him, and boy did I. This was also when living in Melbourne, so a few weeks before hand I started a saving plan, so I had money to spend this weekend. So let the story telling begin...
In the morning I thought I'd be a good friend and get him a birthday cake, so I drove to my place of work (which I told them I could not work that day due to Grand Final) and purchased a cake. I was eager to get home and open the bottle of vodka I bought for myself the previous night, so I also made sure I purchased orange juice whilst getting the cake.
Once I arrived home, I informed my housemate I will need a lift to my friends place, to which she agreed. Then we both foolishly agreed not to worry about a GPS because (famous last words) "Don't worry, I remember where it is" Oh how wrong I was, as we spent 20+ minutes trying to find the place. After countless phone calls, U-turns and F words, we eventually found the place for party. I prepped myself, got my present ready, cake ready, and vodka ready.
I greeted my mate with a hug, a manly hug of course, and handed over the presents. I arrived in good fashion, with a St Kilda hat, mini football and a TAB ticket with $10 for the Saints to win. I was ready for a great game, I only wish I remember the game.
Much like the '08 Grand Final, the opening bounce was electrifying. Many drinks were being consume, by all, and by half-time, I was feeling the effects. Half-time also saw the sausages being ready to eat, which turned out to be helpful in a way. I checked my bottle of V, (that's short for vodka, not the V energy drink) and made sure I was going at a good pace, which turned out to be somewhat true.
Half-time also saw a new, uhh, interesting kind of entertainment, where videos of the, uhh, adult kind was shown, where the storyline was about pirates.
I believe the next incidence happened during the 3rd quarter, where to this day I still hold my head in shame, in where I brought up pretty much everything consumed in the last 24 hours. I thought I was a good aim in the toilet, but my soaked socks proved otherwise, as I seemed to miss the toilet, and get it all over the floor. Walking out with soaked socks, and a glazed look in my eye, I asked for the mop and bucket, then a loud gasp occurred, followed by some cursing. It appears one of the girls that lives at the house doesn't like vomit all over her floor, huh, who would of thought?
While this was being cleaned, I decided to slow down a bit, until I was encouraged to keep going. I spent the 4th quarter on the couch, drinking my OJ with V, and to this day, I do not remember a single thing that happened in the that. All I remember is hearing the siren, and throwing my hat across the room.
Now the party was far from over, as a party bus was planned for the night. We needed some time to kill, so what better way than with a football. Yup, nothing says "No Broken Windows" like a bunch of drunk guys kicking a footy out on the road in a court, hitting a couple cars, but luckily causing no damage. At the end of this activity, it seems me and a newly-made friend declared ourselves the winner, and premiers of Rhonda Court.
We then made the trek to where the bus was waiting for us. Upon arrival, I was given a Jim Beam can, well, not so much given, but found un-opened sitting in the gutter. If you know me, I do not drink anything else other than vodka, and apparently, Jim Beams. During the drive to the city, I consumed about 3/4 of this can, which was amazing in my books.
We arrived at our first of 5 clubs, Icon Bar. For those who do not know Melbourne nightclubs, Icon Bar is, I think, the only bar which allows patrons to dance on the bar. In fact, they encourage this behaviour, and with several litres of vodka in my system, I took advantage of this, much did the rest of the party crew.
Interesting story arose from Icon Bar, as a couple months prior to the Grand Final, I attended my favourite place in all of Melbourne, The Eagle Bar with my friend (the birthday boy). At the Eagle Bar, we chatted to two lovely, but sober girls, and appeared to be funny (which isn't a surprise really). However, by the end of the night, I did not remember names. Fast forward to the last Saturday in the 09' September, and I had two lovely ladies randomly come up to me, all excited and actually knew me. My face would have been priceless, as I did not know this girls at all, or did I.....
Turns out, these two "random" girls, were the two girls from the Eagle Bar. They remembered and recognised me, and they had to just talk to me. Thankfully, by the end of the night, I remembered there names.
So that was Bar #01, with four more to go, so we boarded the bus and went to our second stop. I do not remember the name of the bar, or anything, as I was in there, got a text of the "random girls" requesting I come back to Icon. So I left pretty much unannounced, and the journey back to the bar proved to be quite difficult. After asking complete stranger and security at other nightclubs, I finally found the bar. Walked up to show them my cool stamp to show I've already been in, but was rejected straight away. Something about being too drunk, pfft, whatever!
Calling the two girls inside, I got them to come outside, and the bouncer allowed me to enter, on one condition, that I do not drink, otherwise cops would be call. Not wanting to cause trouble, I agreed to these terms and conditions. I must of spent an hour or two, dancing, drinking water, then the girls had to go home. So here I was, alone at this bar, not knowing where the bus was. If I thought the journey back to Icon was difficult, I was in for a real treat.
I rang my friend, finding out where the bus was, and it was going to be on King's St by the time I got there, I think it was King's St. Anyway, I started off with my usual, asking strangers for direction. Then two guys I asked, who looked very seedy, started following. With me being drunk and friendly, I gave them false hope as I told them they could come on the bus to the next stop. Little did they know, or myself know, there wasn't going to be a next stop. Dum, dum, dum.
I eventually found the bus, with two random, drug-dealing-looking guys, in fear of getting bashed, I boarded the bus. My bigger friends told my new "friends" to go away as they aren't coming on and we are going home. That took care of that problem, the next problem was every one's rumbling stomachs. We founded the nearest MickyD's, grabbed our food, and jumped on the bus, to take us all home.
To no one's sup rise, the bin, which was allocated for rubbish, ended up being for my vomit, as I had a few chunders on the trip home. I got the bus driver to stop just off my street, and decided I would walk home, which was only 600m or so. During this trek, I brought my insides up 4 times, which proved to be quite effective in the morning. Stumbling upstairs, I crashed onto my mattress, and slept it all off.
So '08 and '09 created some stories, and sadly my '10 story will go something like this....
"Tore some tickets, directed people to cinemas, cleaned popcorn, heard the score of a stranger..." But I may plan on going out upon completion at work, which is 9:30pm. So I have some time to go out, have a couple drinks, and least pretend I watched the game. However, I already know the memory of this Grand Final will not come close to the past two years. Maybe I should be preparing and looking forward to the '11 Grand Final, and I might let work know I'm not available that day....
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
2008 and 2009 Grand Finals were memorable and enjoyable, and both had a different atmosphere, but created lasting memories. So what I am going to do right now, is go through the days events of each year, sharing what I remember (and don't remember) and maybe a little sook at the end about missing this years.
2008, Hawks V Cats
This Grand Final was a true reflection of that year for me, and what made it a great day was my band-wagoning with the Hawks for the season.
I invited a few close mates over to watch the game at mine, with the original plan being, sit outside with a TV, pool full of ice and drinks, and enjoy the game in the sun. While it sounded good in theory, practical wise, not so successful. Silly me put water in the pool, then ice, so the ice ended up melting and did not keep the drinks cold. The TV did not get good reception, and the direct sunlight caused a glare. However, I was determined and spent the whole morning trying to get it to work, then my brother called me an idiot, and we moved to inside. At the time, I didn't like the idea, but in retrospect, was the better option, as inside provided fridge, 42" high def TV, pool table, couches and air-conditioning.
We all settled in our spots, me, with my Hawks jumper on, and a couple friends with their Cats one on. The opening bounce proved to be a heart stopper, and we were underway, but while the game just started, the drinks were already flowing.
Half-time, and the game was a good'in, which created a great atmosphere. We needed our own half-time entertainment, so this is where the pool table came to be quite handy, so a few games were played, and a few drinks consumed. 99% of the group were getting to the stage of noticing the alcohol effect, while 1% (well actually, just one of us) was drunk before the opening bounce, as someone opened a beer near him and he smelt it, causing him to get drunk.
With the close game underway again, cheers, boos, and abuse was been hurled throughout the room. This wasn't just directed at the TV, but also each other, which caused me to have a blood nose during the 4th quarter. With about 15 minutes left in the final, Hawks were in front and looking strong, so I confidently downloaded the Hawks club song and started playing it with 10minutes to go. My brother told me to turn it off, as anything could happen. Fast forward 10minutes and I played it again! Being drunk at this time, I rang every Hawk supporter in my phone, which was like 1 or 2 I think, and cheered and sung with them.
With excitement running through my veins, I ran up to the local pub, burst through the door, jumped over the bar and hugged the publican (being a mad Hawk supporter). I then made my disappearance back to the house, where I cooled and calmed myself by jumping in my inflatable. So in the end, it turned out to be a handy device.
With all of us still wanting to party, we thought the most fitting place to do it would be the Mulwala Ski Club, or the Skibi as we like to call it. So we got our sober friend, well, my sister-in-law to drive a car load of us over to Mul. First stop was dinner, which was Maccas, and it turned out to be Cyril. Second stop was the Skibi, where we drank, carried on, and cheered. By the end of the night my jumper was taken by a Hawks fan, and I never did get it back.
Once the Skibi closed, we headed to our usual spot, RickyD's, grabbed ourselves a pizza, and headed to a mate's place to sleep it off.
Next morning, we were picked up, taken back to Oaklands, where many hours of rest occurred, and the excitement of the Grand Final subsided. But boy, it was a great day/night.
2009, Cats V Saints
This Grand Final was a special one, with the main one being, it was my mate's 21st birthday party, so I had to party hard for him, and boy did I. This was also when living in Melbourne, so a few weeks before hand I started a saving plan, so I had money to spend this weekend. So let the story telling begin...
In the morning I thought I'd be a good friend and get him a birthday cake, so I drove to my place of work (which I told them I could not work that day due to Grand Final) and purchased a cake. I was eager to get home and open the bottle of vodka I bought for myself the previous night, so I also made sure I purchased orange juice whilst getting the cake.
Once I arrived home, I informed my housemate I will need a lift to my friends place, to which she agreed. Then we both foolishly agreed not to worry about a GPS because (famous last words) "Don't worry, I remember where it is" Oh how wrong I was, as we spent 20+ minutes trying to find the place. After countless phone calls, U-turns and F words, we eventually found the place for party. I prepped myself, got my present ready, cake ready, and vodka ready.
I greeted my mate with a hug, a manly hug of course, and handed over the presents. I arrived in good fashion, with a St Kilda hat, mini football and a TAB ticket with $10 for the Saints to win. I was ready for a great game, I only wish I remember the game.
Much like the '08 Grand Final, the opening bounce was electrifying. Many drinks were being consume, by all, and by half-time, I was feeling the effects. Half-time also saw the sausages being ready to eat, which turned out to be helpful in a way. I checked my bottle of V, (that's short for vodka, not the V energy drink) and made sure I was going at a good pace, which turned out to be somewhat true.
Half-time also saw a new, uhh, interesting kind of entertainment, where videos of the, uhh, adult kind was shown, where the storyline was about pirates.
I believe the next incidence happened during the 3rd quarter, where to this day I still hold my head in shame, in where I brought up pretty much everything consumed in the last 24 hours. I thought I was a good aim in the toilet, but my soaked socks proved otherwise, as I seemed to miss the toilet, and get it all over the floor. Walking out with soaked socks, and a glazed look in my eye, I asked for the mop and bucket, then a loud gasp occurred, followed by some cursing. It appears one of the girls that lives at the house doesn't like vomit all over her floor, huh, who would of thought?
While this was being cleaned, I decided to slow down a bit, until I was encouraged to keep going. I spent the 4th quarter on the couch, drinking my OJ with V, and to this day, I do not remember a single thing that happened in the that. All I remember is hearing the siren, and throwing my hat across the room.
Now the party was far from over, as a party bus was planned for the night. We needed some time to kill, so what better way than with a football. Yup, nothing says "No Broken Windows" like a bunch of drunk guys kicking a footy out on the road in a court, hitting a couple cars, but luckily causing no damage. At the end of this activity, it seems me and a newly-made friend declared ourselves the winner, and premiers of Rhonda Court.
We then made the trek to where the bus was waiting for us. Upon arrival, I was given a Jim Beam can, well, not so much given, but found un-opened sitting in the gutter. If you know me, I do not drink anything else other than vodka, and apparently, Jim Beams. During the drive to the city, I consumed about 3/4 of this can, which was amazing in my books.
We arrived at our first of 5 clubs, Icon Bar. For those who do not know Melbourne nightclubs, Icon Bar is, I think, the only bar which allows patrons to dance on the bar. In fact, they encourage this behaviour, and with several litres of vodka in my system, I took advantage of this, much did the rest of the party crew.
Interesting story arose from Icon Bar, as a couple months prior to the Grand Final, I attended my favourite place in all of Melbourne, The Eagle Bar with my friend (the birthday boy). At the Eagle Bar, we chatted to two lovely, but sober girls, and appeared to be funny (which isn't a surprise really). However, by the end of the night, I did not remember names. Fast forward to the last Saturday in the 09' September, and I had two lovely ladies randomly come up to me, all excited and actually knew me. My face would have been priceless, as I did not know this girls at all, or did I.....
Turns out, these two "random" girls, were the two girls from the Eagle Bar. They remembered and recognised me, and they had to just talk to me. Thankfully, by the end of the night, I remembered there names.
So that was Bar #01, with four more to go, so we boarded the bus and went to our second stop. I do not remember the name of the bar, or anything, as I was in there, got a text of the "random girls" requesting I come back to Icon. So I left pretty much unannounced, and the journey back to the bar proved to be quite difficult. After asking complete stranger and security at other nightclubs, I finally found the bar. Walked up to show them my cool stamp to show I've already been in, but was rejected straight away. Something about being too drunk, pfft, whatever!
Calling the two girls inside, I got them to come outside, and the bouncer allowed me to enter, on one condition, that I do not drink, otherwise cops would be call. Not wanting to cause trouble, I agreed to these terms and conditions. I must of spent an hour or two, dancing, drinking water, then the girls had to go home. So here I was, alone at this bar, not knowing where the bus was. If I thought the journey back to Icon was difficult, I was in for a real treat.
I rang my friend, finding out where the bus was, and it was going to be on King's St by the time I got there, I think it was King's St. Anyway, I started off with my usual, asking strangers for direction. Then two guys I asked, who looked very seedy, started following. With me being drunk and friendly, I gave them false hope as I told them they could come on the bus to the next stop. Little did they know, or myself know, there wasn't going to be a next stop. Dum, dum, dum.
I eventually found the bus, with two random, drug-dealing-looking guys, in fear of getting bashed, I boarded the bus. My bigger friends told my new "friends" to go away as they aren't coming on and we are going home. That took care of that problem, the next problem was every one's rumbling stomachs. We founded the nearest MickyD's, grabbed our food, and jumped on the bus, to take us all home.
To no one's sup rise, the bin, which was allocated for rubbish, ended up being for my vomit, as I had a few chunders on the trip home. I got the bus driver to stop just off my street, and decided I would walk home, which was only 600m or so. During this trek, I brought my insides up 4 times, which proved to be quite effective in the morning. Stumbling upstairs, I crashed onto my mattress, and slept it all off.
So '08 and '09 created some stories, and sadly my '10 story will go something like this....
"Tore some tickets, directed people to cinemas, cleaned popcorn, heard the score of a stranger..." But I may plan on going out upon completion at work, which is 9:30pm. So I have some time to go out, have a couple drinks, and least pretend I watched the game. However, I already know the memory of this Grand Final will not come close to the past two years. Maybe I should be preparing and looking forward to the '11 Grand Final, and I might let work know I'm not available that day....
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Summer Time
For the last couple years, my summers have been very average, at best. Possibly the best summer I ever had was when I was 15 or 16, can't remember exactly. Literally everyday the local pool was open, I was there with my best mate, having an absolute ball and a good time. The next best summer was in 2008-2009 where I was living in Oaklands, while planning the move to Melbourne. During this summer I spent a lot weekends at the Mulwala ski-club, and venturing out having fun, but didn't really do too much other than that. Although, Australia Day was certainly a great weekend.
The last summer was very average, where I spent a lot of time working, and being bored at home. December and early January was spent in Melbourne, and I did have a couple good days, and spent some time at the pool, in my own pool, and even a trip to the beach and lazing around the house trying to keep cool. However, once I moved back home, summer went downhill and it just was not enjoyable. The only fun I had was at Mulwala during another Australia Day weekend, but it wasn't the greatest weekend I spent.
So I've been thinking about the upcoming summer, and what truly makes an amazing summer. I have compiled a list of things which has to be done, and I aim to try and complete as much of the list as possible this summer.
1/ Buy an inflatable pool and spend 85% of summer in it.
Okay, not really 85% of the summer, it was a hyperbole. However, I think the main aspect of summer is cooling off, and what better way to cool off than to sit in an inflatable pool of an afternoon, in your own backyard, listening to music, and eating icy poles, or even having a couple beverages of the alcoholic nature. For me, that would be a near perfect day, as long as a couple friends were around to enjoy.
2/ Go on a road trip
This is a main one, which does require some saving, and a little bit of planning, but if done right, can make for an awesome weekend, or 4 days, or however long. But where do you go on your road trip? Road trips aren't about the destination, but more-so the journey. Fill a car with mates, camping gear, a map and hit the road, and have fun along the way.
3/ Music, summer music
Jason Mraz. After being sucked back into his music, I feel he has the best songs for summer. People will argue the best songs, as some will say people like Katy Perry or Usher, or maybe heavy metal, depending on their musical tastes. However, I believe the best songs for summer are the slow, mellow, almost reggae, sing-a-long type, and it's right up JM's ally. Listening to "I'm Yours" around a camp fire on the beach, perfect...
4/ Beach/Lake/River
This depends on where you live of course, but during the summer, you have to visit one of these places at least 45 times. I hope to be visiting all three, and having a couple brews at each one. The beach might be the result of a road trip, the lake is a just a small drive away, much same the river. But to visit a natural watering hole, is the key to summer. Summer is the time to get back with nature, as you spent 99.99% of winter indoors, it is now time to get outside and back to what's real with the world.
5/ Floating
This can tie in with No.4, but everyone should go for a day float with friends. Me? I want to plan a big float for a couple days where I float during the day, then at night pull over and camp overnight, and continue floating. Would make a few nice memories.
6/ Backyard Cricket
Biggest Aussie summer activity to do. If you live in Australia, and don't play at least 4 games of backyard during the summer months, your citizenship should be revoked. It doesn't exactly have to be backyard, it may occur in park lands, or riverside, lakeside, beach cricket, or somewhere similar.
7/ BBQ's and parties
This is a must for the summer months, and for a good reason, BBQ's are Cyril, and parties are fun. Soon I will blog about the perfect summer party and what you need to do to achieve it, so stay tuned.
They are the key elements to having an enjoyable summer. For me, it's not only the big moments like a road trip or sitting in my inflatable pool, but it's the little things as well. Like spending 98% of summer in thongs, footy shorts and singlet, or just going for a walk taking everything in. Eating icy poles, being outside at 9pm with light still about having a couple drinks, or just lying on the couch with the aircon blasting watching a movie. All these little things add up to assist the big moments in summer.
Preserving these summer memories are important, that's why I am in talks with my manager about maybe starting a Summer Blog, so I can share and preserve which hopes to be my best summer. If you want to preserve your own memories, this is a no-brainer, but carry a camera with you, 24/7!
One last thing, which is probably the most important thing, the key to summer is, just let it flow. By that I mean, don't force things, or plan everything. Sometimes the best things are the unplanned, such as ringing up your mates at 3pm, and saying backyard cricket in 20mins. Wasn't planned, but it usually turns out to be one of the best days.
So get ready to enjoy summer, stock up on suncream, thongs and icy poles.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
The last summer was very average, where I spent a lot of time working, and being bored at home. December and early January was spent in Melbourne, and I did have a couple good days, and spent some time at the pool, in my own pool, and even a trip to the beach and lazing around the house trying to keep cool. However, once I moved back home, summer went downhill and it just was not enjoyable. The only fun I had was at Mulwala during another Australia Day weekend, but it wasn't the greatest weekend I spent.
So I've been thinking about the upcoming summer, and what truly makes an amazing summer. I have compiled a list of things which has to be done, and I aim to try and complete as much of the list as possible this summer.
1/ Buy an inflatable pool and spend 85% of summer in it.
Okay, not really 85% of the summer, it was a hyperbole. However, I think the main aspect of summer is cooling off, and what better way to cool off than to sit in an inflatable pool of an afternoon, in your own backyard, listening to music, and eating icy poles, or even having a couple beverages of the alcoholic nature. For me, that would be a near perfect day, as long as a couple friends were around to enjoy.
2/ Go on a road trip
This is a main one, which does require some saving, and a little bit of planning, but if done right, can make for an awesome weekend, or 4 days, or however long. But where do you go on your road trip? Road trips aren't about the destination, but more-so the journey. Fill a car with mates, camping gear, a map and hit the road, and have fun along the way.
3/ Music, summer music
Jason Mraz. After being sucked back into his music, I feel he has the best songs for summer. People will argue the best songs, as some will say people like Katy Perry or Usher, or maybe heavy metal, depending on their musical tastes. However, I believe the best songs for summer are the slow, mellow, almost reggae, sing-a-long type, and it's right up JM's ally. Listening to "I'm Yours" around a camp fire on the beach, perfect...
4/ Beach/Lake/River
This depends on where you live of course, but during the summer, you have to visit one of these places at least 45 times. I hope to be visiting all three, and having a couple brews at each one. The beach might be the result of a road trip, the lake is a just a small drive away, much same the river. But to visit a natural watering hole, is the key to summer. Summer is the time to get back with nature, as you spent 99.99% of winter indoors, it is now time to get outside and back to what's real with the world.
5/ Floating
This can tie in with No.4, but everyone should go for a day float with friends. Me? I want to plan a big float for a couple days where I float during the day, then at night pull over and camp overnight, and continue floating. Would make a few nice memories.
6/ Backyard Cricket
Biggest Aussie summer activity to do. If you live in Australia, and don't play at least 4 games of backyard during the summer months, your citizenship should be revoked. It doesn't exactly have to be backyard, it may occur in park lands, or riverside, lakeside, beach cricket, or somewhere similar.
7/ BBQ's and parties
This is a must for the summer months, and for a good reason, BBQ's are Cyril, and parties are fun. Soon I will blog about the perfect summer party and what you need to do to achieve it, so stay tuned.
They are the key elements to having an enjoyable summer. For me, it's not only the big moments like a road trip or sitting in my inflatable pool, but it's the little things as well. Like spending 98% of summer in thongs, footy shorts and singlet, or just going for a walk taking everything in. Eating icy poles, being outside at 9pm with light still about having a couple drinks, or just lying on the couch with the aircon blasting watching a movie. All these little things add up to assist the big moments in summer.
Preserving these summer memories are important, that's why I am in talks with my manager about maybe starting a Summer Blog, so I can share and preserve which hopes to be my best summer. If you want to preserve your own memories, this is a no-brainer, but carry a camera with you, 24/7!
One last thing, which is probably the most important thing, the key to summer is, just let it flow. By that I mean, don't force things, or plan everything. Sometimes the best things are the unplanned, such as ringing up your mates at 3pm, and saying backyard cricket in 20mins. Wasn't planned, but it usually turns out to be one of the best days.
So get ready to enjoy summer, stock up on suncream, thongs and icy poles.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Friday, September 10, 2010
Aisle.... Wait! What?
Whilst working at Safeway, as a checkout chick, delidog and nightguy, I've encountered some unusual people, but none of them compare to the guy that came in on Tuesday night......
So I'm stacking away, just going about my normal work business, and I had a customer come up to me to ask me something. To be honest, he wasn't the most clean-cut, well-dressed, highly presented man I've met, he was kinda the opposite.
So he came up, and this is how the conversation went down...
Guy - "Do you sell any pot?"
Me - "Ummm, maybe aisle [trying to think if we sell pot plants, then I thought again for a second what he said] Wait, what sorry?"
Guy - "You know, pot, weed"
Me - "Oh, sorry, no we don't sell that here"
Guy - "Do you sell it but?"
Me - "Umm, no sorry mate"
Guy - "That's ok, know anybody does? I need some"
Me - "Nah I don't, sorry man"
Guy - "That's cool, thanks anyway man"
Let's just say, that was the most unusual encounter with a customer, ever! It took a couple seconds to think about what he said, and I still am in disbelief he approached me about it. It's not everyday someone comes up to you during work asking if you sell pot. Well, that's my short story for the day, hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
So I'm stacking away, just going about my normal work business, and I had a customer come up to me to ask me something. To be honest, he wasn't the most clean-cut, well-dressed, highly presented man I've met, he was kinda the opposite.
So he came up, and this is how the conversation went down...
Guy - "Do you sell any pot?"
Me - "Ummm, maybe aisle [trying to think if we sell pot plants, then I thought again for a second what he said] Wait, what sorry?"
Guy - "You know, pot, weed"
Me - "Oh, sorry, no we don't sell that here"
Guy - "Do you sell it but?"
Me - "Umm, no sorry mate"
Guy - "That's ok, know anybody does? I need some"
Me - "Nah I don't, sorry man"
Guy - "That's cool, thanks anyway man"
Let's just say, that was the most unusual encounter with a customer, ever! It took a couple seconds to think about what he said, and I still am in disbelief he approached me about it. It's not everyday someone comes up to you during work asking if you sell pot. Well, that's my short story for the day, hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Where's Wally?
I dunno, I use to always struggle finding that red-and-white striped glasses wearing expert hider! He frustrated me something shocking! But he has brought up a interesting question, where's Anthony? Right now, sitting in his car outside of TAFE, scabbing their Internet, but where would he live, if he could live anywhere in the world? Good question...
There are quite a few places that would be nice to live in, so to choose just one can be hard. But there a quite a few factors to take into consideration when thinking of the best place to live. Things such as government, career prospect, leisure and culture.
Government is such a big issue because I wanted to sound smart by appearing to talk about smart-people stuff. However, I do want to live in a country that is a democracy, where I have freedom and right to choice. So I think most of the middle-east countries, and places like Korea and China, are out of the picture.
When I finally become, Ted Mosby, Architect! I might have to think about relocating from Oaklands, because let's be honest, I don't see much boom on the horizon for the village, but where would be a good place to start an architectural career? It depends on what sort of buildings you want to design I guess. If you want to design beach houses, then Canada or Antarctica isn't the ideal place, or if you want to design igloos, Hawaii or Egypt isn't the best location. It also depends on your style of an designer/architect, by that I mean if you are more into the culture, or if you are into modern buildings, and so forth. A couple places I wouldn't mind plotting a few buildings in would be Hawaii, Gold Coast and Italy (just so I get to learn Italian)
I think leisure is a major factor in deciding where I would live, because I'm the kind of guy that is up for fun. So if a place doesn't offer too much fun, I'm not offering too much of me. Sports would be a major factor in the equation, and if the right sport isn't offered, well I will be packing my bags. Since most countries outside of Australia doesn't offer AFL, I do find it somewhat difficult to picture myself living for a length-of-time in the place. Sport isn't the only thing, mini-golf is right up there! If you do not offer mini-golf, I'm sorry but you will have to pull your finger out! A beach would be lovely for the summer times, maybe some mountains in the distant for spring hikes, a lake, SWIMMIN' HOLE!, and the usual things of movies and shops.
The culture of the place is a key notion of determining whether I would live there or not. At the moment, I'm not into rap, or being murdered, so I wouldn't be moving to Brooklyn in New York anytime soon. I do like to drink, but for some reason, I do not think I could keep up with the Irish, even though they do have awesome accents! Spaghetti and lasagna are in my top 5 foods, so Italy may be possible, especially with the language and Venice river boat rides. Penguins are pretty cool, let's face it, so having hard nipples 24/7 isn't my idea of fun times, so Antarctica is out of the picture. I do like the culture of the Gold Coast, which is sunny, laid-back and refreshed.
I guess to sum up, I don't think I could ever move out of Australia to live. We have a terrific culture, we have AFL and I will probably create my own style of architecture in this country. Does that mean I'll never leave the country? No, I would like to do some travelling, see a bit of the world, just nothing permanent. If I was to move anywhere in the world, it would be either Gold Coast, or Melbourne.
Now you are wondering, "Why couldn't he just said Gold Coast or Melbourne at the start?!" Answer being, I wanted to waste 5 minutes of your time....
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
There are quite a few places that would be nice to live in, so to choose just one can be hard. But there a quite a few factors to take into consideration when thinking of the best place to live. Things such as government, career prospect, leisure and culture.
Government is such a big issue because I wanted to sound smart by appearing to talk about smart-people stuff. However, I do want to live in a country that is a democracy, where I have freedom and right to choice. So I think most of the middle-east countries, and places like Korea and China, are out of the picture.
When I finally become, Ted Mosby, Architect! I might have to think about relocating from Oaklands, because let's be honest, I don't see much boom on the horizon for the village, but where would be a good place to start an architectural career? It depends on what sort of buildings you want to design I guess. If you want to design beach houses, then Canada or Antarctica isn't the ideal place, or if you want to design igloos, Hawaii or Egypt isn't the best location. It also depends on your style of an designer/architect, by that I mean if you are more into the culture, or if you are into modern buildings, and so forth. A couple places I wouldn't mind plotting a few buildings in would be Hawaii, Gold Coast and Italy (just so I get to learn Italian)
I think leisure is a major factor in deciding where I would live, because I'm the kind of guy that is up for fun. So if a place doesn't offer too much fun, I'm not offering too much of me. Sports would be a major factor in the equation, and if the right sport isn't offered, well I will be packing my bags. Since most countries outside of Australia doesn't offer AFL, I do find it somewhat difficult to picture myself living for a length-of-time in the place. Sport isn't the only thing, mini-golf is right up there! If you do not offer mini-golf, I'm sorry but you will have to pull your finger out! A beach would be lovely for the summer times, maybe some mountains in the distant for spring hikes, a lake, SWIMMIN' HOLE!, and the usual things of movies and shops.
The culture of the place is a key notion of determining whether I would live there or not. At the moment, I'm not into rap, or being murdered, so I wouldn't be moving to Brooklyn in New York anytime soon. I do like to drink, but for some reason, I do not think I could keep up with the Irish, even though they do have awesome accents! Spaghetti and lasagna are in my top 5 foods, so Italy may be possible, especially with the language and Venice river boat rides. Penguins are pretty cool, let's face it, so having hard nipples 24/7 isn't my idea of fun times, so Antarctica is out of the picture. I do like the culture of the Gold Coast, which is sunny, laid-back and refreshed.
I guess to sum up, I don't think I could ever move out of Australia to live. We have a terrific culture, we have AFL and I will probably create my own style of architecture in this country. Does that mean I'll never leave the country? No, I would like to do some travelling, see a bit of the world, just nothing permanent. If I was to move anywhere in the world, it would be either Gold Coast, or Melbourne.
Now you are wondering, "Why couldn't he just said Gold Coast or Melbourne at the start?!" Answer being, I wanted to waste 5 minutes of your time....
From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Remember That Time We Went To Crown....
Horsey horsey, why don't you carry me,
Horsey horsey, standing there in the rain.
Horsey ahh.
Horsey ayy.
....
Meat pie, I love you so,
Four 'n' Twenty from a Toorak Road,
Stuck in traffic, everyone's headin' out,
Stuck in traffc, what's this all about?
Sitting in the Lounge room, sippin' on a cold one.
Oh, oh, oh, why don't you love me?
Oh, oh, oh, let me love you.
Blue, green. Blue, blue green,
Chick from the table who over D'ed.
Green, blue. Green, green blue,
Fin footed mammal, how much do we owe?
...... Thirty-nine sixty
Horsey horsey, standing there in the rain.
Horsey ahh.
Horsey ayy.
....
Meat pie, I love you so,
Four 'n' Twenty from a Toorak Road,
Stuck in traffic, everyone's headin' out,
Stuck in traffc, what's this all about?
Sitting in the Lounge room, sippin' on a cold one.
Oh, oh, oh, why don't you love me?
Oh, oh, oh, let me love you.
Blue, green. Blue, blue green,
Chick from the table who over D'ed.
Green, blue. Green, green blue,
Fin footed mammal, how much do we owe?
...... Thirty-nine sixty
My Secret Tatics!
Okay what I am about to share with you is of great benefit, especially if you are unemployed and looking for a job. A previous blog I talked about looking for a job, and gave a bunch of tips I learnt over my hunting days. Now I'm going to talk about my tactics and weapons I use once I find a job and get a interview.
Weapon of Choice 01 - Suit Up!
As the legendary man himself always say, "SUIT UP!" - Barney Stinson. Every interview and group interview, with the exception of one, I have suited up, and we are talking full-blown suit, shirt, tie and jacket, oh, and pants of course. Oh and I was wearing shoes. And I also had socks on, but that's not the point! I've attended quite a few group interviews, especially for really crappy "promoting" jobs and telemarketing, and I was always best dressed in my jacket and tie. The way I see it, you can never over-dress for a interview of any kind. The only time I didn't suit up was for a group interview for a job with Cotton On, as my housemate at the time said dress trendy (still got the job but). Suiting up for a interview shows you are professional, serious about getting the job, and gives off the vibe and impression. When I am CEO of my multi-national, billion-dollar empire and I'm hiring people, if they walk into my office without a suit, I won't give them the time of my day, out the door! Even if it's for a cleaning job, always suit up! I once had short notice of a job interview and could not get my suit dry cleaned in time, and I was stressing because I didn't want to go in a dirty suit, or no suit, so what did I do? I went out, and bought a new suit! For those who remember my early blogs, I bought the suit which led me to my first job in Melbourne....
Weapon of Choice 02 - Weakness'
In my early days of interviews, when asked this question, I didn't really know how to answer it. I use to answer it with "Uhhh, ummm, hmm, uhhh, not sure, don't think I have any" But really I had plenty. Then I was watching Dr Phil and he had a guy in helping out with interview tips, and he gave the best response to the question...
"So what is your weakness?"
"Marsh mellows"
"What?"
"Yes marsh mellows, they are delicious, I just can't help myself, roasted even better"
"Hahaha yes true"
I've used this before, just not marsh mellows. When asked what is my weakness, I said "Baking a eatable cake" and "Flying a plane" You are thinking "Omg, what a douche, what are you thinking?!?!?!" Well, I got both jobs, so it didn't turn out too bad. If you are a girl, you can say something like "Re-building a car engine" or something creative, funny and unrelated to the job. It is something the interviewer isn't expecting, and can have a slight chuckle over. In fact my cake one actually led to a small discussion on how to bake a cake.... I still failed at it though :(
Tactic 01 - Make Your First Impression Last
Not sure if a tactic, or a weapon, there is no real definition between the two titles, but anyway, besides the point. It takes about 7 seconds when you first meet someone to form an impression with someone. This ties in with the suit business (See what I did there, I'm clever), that when you meet your interviewer, smile, introduce yourself, and give a firm handshake. If you look like you don't want to be there, give a limp handshake, or worst, not one, and you just look sloppy, your chances of seeing a future interview, or job, is pretty much out the window.
Tactic 02 - Be Yourself To A Degree
Not sure how I'll go explaining this one but I'll try. Okay, what is one of the most serious jobs you can think of? Doctor? Lawyer? Okay, what about at the other end of the spectrum, a job where you may need to be fun and outgoing? Mini-golf course assistant? Radio talk-show host (not ABC, I mean Hamish and Andy style)? What you have to do is Tailor your personality to suit the job you are going for. Take me for example, I'm not exactly Mr Serious, I'm usually a fun, out-going, funny guy. I went for a job interview for a pick-pack job in a warehouse, which required me to actually be serious. This proved to be quite the task, but I managed to get through the interview. The reason I was serious was because it was a job that required concentration, and well, seriousness. Not really the job I would pursue, but I was desperate at the time. I had an interview with Cotton On, which required me to fun and out-going, as that is what they look for in their employees.
So to an extent, you naturally go for a job which suits your personality for a start, like I won't be going for any lawyer jobs in the future (Mostly because I am not studying the field). But I'm more than happy to go for retail jobs or customer service as it allows me, to be me. However, let's say I go for a job to be a receptionist at Boral Bricks, to gain industry experience and knowledge which could help with my future career. So most receptionists aren't like the girl in Cotton On, they are usually answering phones, taking enquires, and kind of have to take their job serious. So I'm in the interview, I wouldn't exactly be cracking too many jokes (To be honest, I'd crack at least 1 or 2), and my body language would be kind of calm/still, and in a serious tone. So I'm sort of manipulating my personality to suit the job at hand, I'm not changing it, because when they clock hits 5:00pm, the real Anthony is out in force! Now compare that personality to if I was being interview for a job at a mini-golf course. You would think the manager wants you to be fun, out-going and entertaining. So I would crack at least 20 jokes, be active in my body language and so forth.
Not sure if it's the greatest advice, as most people say, "Don't be someone you are not" Which I agree, but sometimes even the fun-est person needs to be serious to pay the bills.
Now this is the main event, this tactic, or weapon, has landed me 3 jobs, and a friend a job, and it could possibly lead me to another job. I am going to share with you, "The Awesome Scale"
'OMG WHAT IS THE AWESOME SCALE!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!!!!???????????!!!" you are asking yourself. Well let me take you through.....
I've been to 3 group interviews, twice with Safeway, once with Cotton On, and every time you have to pair up with someone and "interview" them and then present your findings to the rest of the group. So you start of simple, ask about hobbies, movies, why they want a job, study, blah blah, then you throw them off track...
"On a scale of 1 to 10, how awesome do you rate yourself?"
Now, most people don't want to sound stuckup, so they say 6 or 7, which is awesome, but it's no me. They then usually ask you the same, I usually say, "8, but I have been known to be 9, and I've pushed for a couple 10s" But you have to say it in the right tone, in a joking way, delievery is key. So anyway, you got their score of 7, and now you have to present to the group.
So you are telling them about their hobbies, their course they are studying, and then you bring up the Awesome Scale.
"And [insert name here] rates him/herself a 7 on the Awesome Scale [look around for baffled faces]. But actually since talking to [insert name here], I reckon he/she is about a 8.5, can probably push a mid 9 on their good day"
Delivery is key here! You have to do it all with a smile, don't sound serious, and just have fun with it. Laughter is proven to be the main response, mostly due to the creativity and uniqueness of the question.
I have asked this 3 times, I ended up getting all three jobs (although I probably would of the job regardless, but that's beside the point damn it!). I told my housemate about it, she used it in her group interview, and ended up getting a job as well. So it has a 100% success rate, which isn't too bad.
So there are a few of my weapons and tactics in a job interview. What works for me, may not work for you, but it works for me, so don't complain if it doesn't for you.
From The One They Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
Weapon of Choice 01 - Suit Up!
As the legendary man himself always say, "SUIT UP!" - Barney Stinson. Every interview and group interview, with the exception of one, I have suited up, and we are talking full-blown suit, shirt, tie and jacket, oh, and pants of course. Oh and I was wearing shoes. And I also had socks on, but that's not the point! I've attended quite a few group interviews, especially for really crappy "promoting" jobs and telemarketing, and I was always best dressed in my jacket and tie. The way I see it, you can never over-dress for a interview of any kind. The only time I didn't suit up was for a group interview for a job with Cotton On, as my housemate at the time said dress trendy (still got the job but). Suiting up for a interview shows you are professional, serious about getting the job, and gives off the vibe and impression. When I am CEO of my multi-national, billion-dollar empire and I'm hiring people, if they walk into my office without a suit, I won't give them the time of my day, out the door! Even if it's for a cleaning job, always suit up! I once had short notice of a job interview and could not get my suit dry cleaned in time, and I was stressing because I didn't want to go in a dirty suit, or no suit, so what did I do? I went out, and bought a new suit! For those who remember my early blogs, I bought the suit which led me to my first job in Melbourne....
Weapon of Choice 02 - Weakness'
In my early days of interviews, when asked this question, I didn't really know how to answer it. I use to answer it with "Uhhh, ummm, hmm, uhhh, not sure, don't think I have any" But really I had plenty. Then I was watching Dr Phil and he had a guy in helping out with interview tips, and he gave the best response to the question...
"So what is your weakness?"
"Marsh mellows"
"What?"
"Yes marsh mellows, they are delicious, I just can't help myself, roasted even better"
"Hahaha yes true"
I've used this before, just not marsh mellows. When asked what is my weakness, I said "Baking a eatable cake" and "Flying a plane" You are thinking "Omg, what a douche, what are you thinking?!?!?!" Well, I got both jobs, so it didn't turn out too bad. If you are a girl, you can say something like "Re-building a car engine" or something creative, funny and unrelated to the job. It is something the interviewer isn't expecting, and can have a slight chuckle over. In fact my cake one actually led to a small discussion on how to bake a cake.... I still failed at it though :(
Tactic 01 - Make Your First Impression Last
Not sure if a tactic, or a weapon, there is no real definition between the two titles, but anyway, besides the point. It takes about 7 seconds when you first meet someone to form an impression with someone. This ties in with the suit business (See what I did there, I'm clever), that when you meet your interviewer, smile, introduce yourself, and give a firm handshake. If you look like you don't want to be there, give a limp handshake, or worst, not one, and you just look sloppy, your chances of seeing a future interview, or job, is pretty much out the window.
Tactic 02 - Be Yourself To A Degree
Not sure how I'll go explaining this one but I'll try. Okay, what is one of the most serious jobs you can think of? Doctor? Lawyer? Okay, what about at the other end of the spectrum, a job where you may need to be fun and outgoing? Mini-golf course assistant? Radio talk-show host (not ABC, I mean Hamish and Andy style)? What you have to do is Tailor your personality to suit the job you are going for. Take me for example, I'm not exactly Mr Serious, I'm usually a fun, out-going, funny guy. I went for a job interview for a pick-pack job in a warehouse, which required me to actually be serious. This proved to be quite the task, but I managed to get through the interview. The reason I was serious was because it was a job that required concentration, and well, seriousness. Not really the job I would pursue, but I was desperate at the time. I had an interview with Cotton On, which required me to fun and out-going, as that is what they look for in their employees.
So to an extent, you naturally go for a job which suits your personality for a start, like I won't be going for any lawyer jobs in the future (Mostly because I am not studying the field). But I'm more than happy to go for retail jobs or customer service as it allows me, to be me. However, let's say I go for a job to be a receptionist at Boral Bricks, to gain industry experience and knowledge which could help with my future career. So most receptionists aren't like the girl in Cotton On, they are usually answering phones, taking enquires, and kind of have to take their job serious. So I'm in the interview, I wouldn't exactly be cracking too many jokes (To be honest, I'd crack at least 1 or 2), and my body language would be kind of calm/still, and in a serious tone. So I'm sort of manipulating my personality to suit the job at hand, I'm not changing it, because when they clock hits 5:00pm, the real Anthony is out in force! Now compare that personality to if I was being interview for a job at a mini-golf course. You would think the manager wants you to be fun, out-going and entertaining. So I would crack at least 20 jokes, be active in my body language and so forth.
Not sure if it's the greatest advice, as most people say, "Don't be someone you are not" Which I agree, but sometimes even the fun-est person needs to be serious to pay the bills.
Now this is the main event, this tactic, or weapon, has landed me 3 jobs, and a friend a job, and it could possibly lead me to another job. I am going to share with you, "The Awesome Scale"
'OMG WHAT IS THE AWESOME SCALE!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!!!!???????????!!!" you are asking yourself. Well let me take you through.....
I've been to 3 group interviews, twice with Safeway, once with Cotton On, and every time you have to pair up with someone and "interview" them and then present your findings to the rest of the group. So you start of simple, ask about hobbies, movies, why they want a job, study, blah blah, then you throw them off track...
"On a scale of 1 to 10, how awesome do you rate yourself?"
Now, most people don't want to sound stuckup, so they say 6 or 7, which is awesome, but it's no me. They then usually ask you the same, I usually say, "8, but I have been known to be 9, and I've pushed for a couple 10s" But you have to say it in the right tone, in a joking way, delievery is key. So anyway, you got their score of 7, and now you have to present to the group.
So you are telling them about their hobbies, their course they are studying, and then you bring up the Awesome Scale.
"And [insert name here] rates him/herself a 7 on the Awesome Scale [look around for baffled faces]. But actually since talking to [insert name here], I reckon he/she is about a 8.5, can probably push a mid 9 on their good day"
Delivery is key here! You have to do it all with a smile, don't sound serious, and just have fun with it. Laughter is proven to be the main response, mostly due to the creativity and uniqueness of the question.
I have asked this 3 times, I ended up getting all three jobs (although I probably would of the job regardless, but that's beside the point damn it!). I told my housemate about it, she used it in her group interview, and ended up getting a job as well. So it has a 100% success rate, which isn't too bad.
So there are a few of my weapons and tactics in a job interview. What works for me, may not work for you, but it works for me, so don't complain if it doesn't for you.
From The One They Anthony, This Is The Life And Times
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