That One Story

We all have that one story, that one story in which we can not escape from. That one story that haunts our life forever. That one story, upon re-telling it, never gets old. That one story that gets told at your 21st. This post, is, That One Story.


The year was 1995 (I think), yours truely was a happy 7 year old kid, embarking on the family holiday to sunny Queensland. Everything was going great, the beach, the sun, the AMUSEMENT PARKS!!! They were the highlight for me, all the rides, all the lollies, the cool little toys like dolphins on a surfboard. It was a great family trip, we all had fun, and forged a lifetime worth of memories. Sadly, I was involved in one of them lifetime memories.

I forget where the main story unfolds, but let's just say Queensland for the heck of it. But geez, where to begin with this story.....

I was inside watching tv, and the older kids and adults were out on the patio talking amongst themselves. I don't know what the conversations were about, but probably about wallets and stamps. Now, everyone, and I mean everyone, gets that feeling when you are brewing something shocking, and you want to share it with the world. This feeling swept my body like the waves at high tide, and I had to "show" everyone.

Being a young, care-free, seven year old, I raced outside to where everyone was sitting, and blurted out the quote that would forever haunt me...

"Hey everyone, listen to my fart!....... OH NO!!"

Which then I proceeded to rush, no not rush, belted, dashed, sprinted, whatever word you use, if I was up against Usian Bolt and a toliet was at the finish line, he would be eating my dust! And god I hope it would be only my dust he would be eating.

So there it is, I wanted to impress everyone with my tremendous fart I had brewing, only for it to be shattered. Let us not deny it, we all have had this moment in our life. Where you don't know whether it will be a fart or a poo, but we let it rip anyway. It shows you are bold and risk-taking. I only wish I had my moment in the privacy of a bathroom and not on the patio surrounded by family and friends.


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times