Melbourne's Violence

Most of my blogs so far have been memories, or attempted humour (key word was 'attempted') but now I think it's time for a more serious one. This comes after reading and hearing about all the attacks in Melbourne, and how they don't know how to stop the violence.

I lived in Melbourne for a year, and during that period that went out on many occasions, yet I was fortunate enough to not be anywhere near a fight. I was lucky to have not witnessed any of the violence that constantly sprayed the Herald Sun and the new reports at night. However, there were a couple nights walking home, alone, I did get a bit scared when I heard footsteps behind me. It seems like a lot of the attacks are unprovoked, fueled by alcohol, and let's face it, a guy my size does not stand a chance in a confrontation.

So I thought I'd google some articles about some attacks in Melbourne, and in the google search bar I started typing 'bashings' and before I had the chance to say 'in Melbourne', google already suggested it. Not a good start for Melbourne.

I found one article, which will sum up a lot of my views on the matter. It was about the attack on two men outside QBH Nightclub in Southbank, 2007.

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/victoria/plea-to-end-bashings/story-e6frf7kx-1111113686373

^^^ Link to the article. But to sum it up, two men were killed in the span of a couple weeks outside two nightclubs by being punched. The article then talked about how the families of the victims want venues to take responsibility on the matter.

Now firstly, this happened in 2007, 3 years ago, and the same crap is still going on. I read an article in the Herald Sun the other day about a young male, 17 or 18, slashing another kid's throat on a tram while he tried to rob him. He then bragged about it on facebook and before he went out, he admitted he wanted to kill someone. The thug also told police there was nothing they can do to him either. I think the victim survived the attack, can't remember fully.

Let's use these two articles as my main rant and reference points.

I want to know, where the hell do these people get the idea they can just go around and inflict this type of damage on people? Two people were killed after being punched and falling and hitting their heads on the ground. Two parents lost their sons that night. Any parent reading this, I am sure the last thing you want is a policeman knocking on your door in the early hours of Sunday telling that your son/daughter is in hospital, or worse, dead. As for this punk kid who slashed the kid's throat, he should be locked up for 25 years, give him time to think about his life and maybe he might mature. Because going out with a knife with the intent to kill, isn't exactly the indication your life is good. You seriously have issues which need to be addressed, and addressed hard.

What are some ways we can reduce violence in the streets and public transport? The easy answer is, more police. But the government then complains about budget and crap. Who cares! Make room in the budget! I went out one night in Melbourne when they had a huge police blitz, there was seriously 4 police on every street block, and I felt safe. However, this was only done for a weekend. Why can't they employ this every weekend and have higher police numbers patrolling the streets of a Friday and Saturday night? When we are talking about people's lives and well being, there should not be a price.

Venues need to enforce the responsible serving of alcohol, as most of these incidences are fuelled by alcohol. I don't have any facts or sources on this, just a theory I have, but I believe venues pretty much throw the RSA out the window in search of higher profits. Basic mathematics, a guy walks into a bar (no it's not a joke) with $150 looking to spend it all on booze. He only spends $50, and asked to leave due to intoxication (examples), the venue does not know it but he could of spent another $100. Multiply $100 by say, 400 people in the venue, they have the off-chance of losing $40,000 (once again, examples). So venues keep patrons in as long as possible, so they get as much money out of them as possible, then when they are finally causing trouble, they kick them out on the streets.

People have said earlier closure times of venues, or earlier lock-out times. This would not fix the problem, it would just mean people are out on the street earlier and drunker. Let's face it, 95% of people who go out, go out with the sole purpose of getting "plastered" or "totally wasted" (a stat I made up, but seems right). If they go out knowing they can only be in the bar until 1am, they will want to drink faster and harder to reach the state of "plastered" in the shorter time span. Not really a smart idea there.

I think one way to fix the problem is tougher laws. Messages need to be sent out to the trouble makers that if you do the crime, you will do the time. Harsher penalties might not make a difference right away, but once people are being locked up, someone might think twice before throwing a punch for fear of jail time.

I think the main problem however, which can't be fixed, or maybe it can but it has to start early, is the development of the person. You hear stories of how people change when they drink, they either become aggressive, more stupid or very emotional. For me, when I drink, I never become aggressive, the most is stupid and sometimes emotional. But children need to be developed and taught how to behave properly at a early age, so when they do start drinking, they do not turn into a completely different person. Some adults, older teenagers, are just a lost cause, as lot of them go out, drink to get wasted and look to solely fight people. Maybe we should put these "tough guys" in a boxing ring with some world champions so they can be in a real fight. There is nothing tough about hitting blokes from behind, ganging up like 4 on 1, or stomping on some one's head while they are on the ground (Yes I heard this story today about the stomping, was not a pretty mental image). For these lost causes, put them in jail for life, get them off the street, we don't need them!

The problem of violence and alcohol isn't going to be fixed overnight, it is going to be a long haul of painful door knocks and new reports. But I am hoping one day to live in a world, or maybe my grand-kids, can live in a world, where violence is no longer presence. In the mean time, more police, better RSA, tougher laws and early development might be the only foreseeable way to fix the problem. We need to do something now before more lives are damaged, because next time I go out in Melbourne, I don't want to be thinking all night "Will I make it home alive tonight?"

From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

Hamish & Anthony.... The Plan

I have been devising a plan to rid Andy from Hamish & Andy and join Hamish to form Hamish & Anthony. This plan is fool-proof and can not see it not working at all. I have been working on it for the past 3 minutes and think in about 3 weeks time, maybe 4, Andy will be gone, in his place, the one you call Anthony.

Step 1 - Go out and film me doing funny stuff.
Step 2 - Upload to youtube.
Step 3 - Get like 10,000,000 views in 2 days.
Step 4 - Ring up Hamish & Andy and tell them about the funny youtube video.
Step 5 - Wait for Hamish & Andy to watch my funny youtube video.
Step 6 - Get phone call from Hamish saying he loved it and wants me to go on the radio for interview.
Step 7 - Go on radio show.
Step 8 - Be super funny, like usual, during radio interview.
Step 9 - Have Hamish offer job.
Step 10 - Accept job, whilst kicking Andy out of the studio at the same time.

Then from there, it is ghosting, Fred Bassett, travelling in a caravan and free eating for a week.

So there is my plan to be famous, 10 easy steps. And if someone decides to copy my plan, I will get very mad at you and probably ring you up and saying I am very mad at you.

The way I look at it, Hamish & Andy have the sweetest job in the world! They go on these trips around Australia, USA and England, they travelled on a ship to Tasmania! They were on Rove, showcasing their ghosting abilities and how to eat for free for a week. They did a skit on taxi driving, and they just are funny as! So I can not wait to replace Andy and join Hamish in the all wacky fun.


From The One They Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

Into The Big Smoke

In the mist of looking to move out of home again, I can't help but think back to the time when I moved out of the home for the very first time [reminiscing music plays in the background]

The year was 2008 BM (Before Melbourne), and it was around Augustish and I had been working at my then-current job for a little bit over a year. I thought to myself, "I do not want to do this all my life" then when I knocked of work, I looked at university courses. After a few weeks of deliberating, I decided to pursue the university pathway.

I won't bore you with my uni application, that can be a whole other blog. However, I decided to advertise my need of two housemates in Melbourne over facebook, hoping one of my friends, or two, would jump to the idea. No such luck occurred.

My best mate and second best mate, yes believe it or not, I do have two friends, toyed around with the idea we find a pad together. Looking back, it would have been a disaster because, well, I would have been the lil b'arch of the house. So I was back to square one.

The month of November was half-way through and still no luck with finding someone. Then one-fateful day/night, I don't remember exactly how it happened but a girl, who was attending uni in Bundoora asked to be a housemate for her and her friend. I knew the girl, but as for her friend, I did not.

I jumped at the idea, cos let's face it, I was in no position at the time to be turning down offers for houses. Then we spent the next couple weeks messaging each other houses to look at and so forth. With me being so far away, it was hard to be to physically inspect the places, so the girl had to do most of it. And for the record, she did a lot, well, pretty much, everything in order for us to apply, inspect, move in etc.

So there I was, sending links for nice houses, 3 bedrooms, some were 2 baths, houses, flats, townhouses, some were on quiet streets, some on main roads, some were single storey, but some were two. I then made a date for when I could come down one weekend to do some inspections in person, to actually make a contribution to the cause.

So at 7am, I made the trip down with a friend and met up with her, but got my friend to start driving when we got close to Melbourne as this was the first time I have ever been in that area of Melbourne. I had a little booklet you may call it of a few houses and their inspection times.

We inspected three houses that day I think, one was a nice unit in a quiet court, another was a dirty old crappy house, and the third was an alright-but-not-as-good-as-the-unit two storey townhouse. In between inspections, we visited Northland, a massive shopping centre (well it appeared massive at the start) and a McDonalds. Now, these two locations hold meaning later in another blog.

We put in our applications for the unit and townhouse, and then went back to my mates to stay the night. However, we ended up going to the greyhounds and had a bit of a punt, so it turned out to be a good day.

That Tuesday following, my housemate got a phone call of the real estate letting us know we got our application accepted for the townhouse. She must of told her she needed to discuss it with the rest of us, and she did. I told her that was excellent and I'm willing to live there. The next day I got a message saying we now have a house.

The main thing that surprised me was leading up to the inspections, my friend informed me to start early as it could take months to find a place, however it turned out it only took a couple days.

So here was the dates leading up,
Saturday 3rd Jan, 2009, Inspected house
Tuesday 6th Jan, 2009, Offered house
Wednesday 7th Jan, 2009, Accepted house
Saturday 10th Jan, 2009, Signed house

So that Saturday I travelled back down to sign the lease, hand over money and grab the keys to my new house. We made the trip to Northland to get the keys cut, and I nearly got lost in that dumb centre! Oh and just for reference sake, our new place was in Heidelberg Heights, but like many of posts, there will be more of this to come.

And there I was, standing out the front of the house I would be living at for 12 months, next to me, two girls I would had to put up with for 12 months (Ha, nah they are alright). It was an exciting time, and even though it took me over a month to officially move in, I still had lots to do until then........


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

How I Met Your Russell

Okay guys, you are old enough. I'm gonna tell you the story of how I met your Russell. Sure you have heard the short version. But there's a bigger story, and it's important for you to hear it.

Once upon a time, before I was "Anthony", I had this whole other life. It was way back in 2010, I was single, I had a receding hair line, my life as a building design student was taking off and I had lived in Oaklands with my Dad and brother. Until a warm summer day when walking into TAFE stuffed it all up!

There he was guys, it was very hard to miss him. He had bright, BRIGHT, red hair! To be perfectly honest, I don't remember the first conversation we had, but based on him, he probably said something like,

"Hi, I'm Ronald McDonald"

I kid, I kid, the kid is alright. I know he will read this blog, so just for poos and giggles I'm going to say, my first impression of Russell was I thought he was a total douchebag!! (LOL JK)

Now, 6 months later and that impression still hasn't changed! (LOL JK)

But we have shared some magical moments in life. Such as him discovering me wandering Dean St after I was having a snooze in a car park. He then, surprisingly, managed to get me into the local nightclub, where I proceeded to get lost and wander out, losing him.

I look forward to the many more memories we have yet created :)


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

eBay At It's Best.... Or Worst

So last term in TAFE our project was to design a house on a sloping site. I spent days trying to wrap my head about it, and I did a bit of googling to find what other designers have done with a sloping. Then I came across probably one of the dumbest, or pretty much a scam, on eBay. Ebay is really the place you can buy anything!

That's right, you can buy plans for ready to build houses! All you do is pay, in this case, $290 and give the plans to the builder and BOOM, you have a house! Before I started this course, I would of thought it was possible, but after actually learning a thing or two, this is a big waste of money!!

If any of my loyal viewers out there are thinking of buying plans of ebay, DON'T!!!

Let me outline a couple reasons on why it is silly to do so.

1/ This is the biggest reason, the house has to be designed for the site! Each block of land is different, from the slope, from the orientation to the soil, to landmarks such as trees or rocks. If you have a sloping site, littered with trees, you can not simply buy a plan of ebay and stick it on your block! You need engineers and designers to design the slab and the cut-and-fill.

2/ Council may not approve it. Varying councils have different regulations of new houses being built, and if it is in a new estate, the developers may be particular on how the house should look. You might buy a block of land in an area which is rich in heritage. But you don't hire a designer or even speak to council, spend $300 on a crappy plan, go to council and they will reject you because it doesn't enhance the streetscape.

3/ The plan mentioned above offers a bracing plan. Now, how they do this is beyond me! I might even have a talk to one of the teachers and see how he reacts to the idea. You can not do a bracing plan for a house when you do not know where it is being built. A house in a N1 area will need less bracing than in a N3, but how do you know the area? How do these ebay designers know your area? They don't!

4/ Different climates need different designs. If someone in Darwin bought the plan, may god help him! Or if someone Alice Springs, or even Gold Coast, Sydney, Melbourne. All of these areas are in different climate zones which require different designs.

5/ Back onto council regulations, in Victoria there is a little thing called the ResCode. This dictates how your design is, and your design can be greatly affected if your neighbouring blocks already have dwellings on it. For example, the above plan may have windows in the wrong place, which may allow you to look into neighbours window, so you have the move the window. This changes a lot of your design, and once again, your ebay designer did not know this.

I think this doesn't just go for eBay, but also companies like GJ Gardiner and Simmonds. They have these nice display homes, and these nice plans and everything, and you buy a block and buy the plans, and it gets built there. However, they face the same problem above, with different sites, regulations and the like.

One of my teachers told me a little tale where a man saw this beautiful display home, it was everything he wanted in a house. He bought his block of land and told the company that he wants this exact house on his block....

The house was built, and he moved in, however he faced a little problem. The display home was on a corner block where vehicle access was obtain from the south side of the street (house was on a south and east corner). Now since he asked for the exact same house, he got the exact same house, he did not however have the exact same block. His block was not a corner block, and could not get direct vehicle access via the south because well, he had his neighbour's house, and did not have enough space for a turning circle.

This is a real example, I did not make this up. So you can see the troubles of getting pre-made plans, which may cost only $1000, but in the long run, can cost you 10x more. So it doesn't hurt to lash out and spend a little bit more on a designer or architect, where you will not only get a house that works perfectly with your site, but it won't be a run-of-the-mill copy which hundreds of other people might have.

From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

Ted Mosby, Architect

I have decided I am legally going to change my name to Ted Mosby, and go to University and get my architecture degree, do my masters and become a registered architect. That way, when I am in a bar, I can introduce myself as, "Ted Mosby, Architect" And the chicks will love it!! Best plan ever in life!

You are probably wondering, "Is he joking, or is he serious?" I really hope you think I am joking, because I am. It would be silly to legally change my name to Ted Mosby. As for the architect side of things, that is a possibility swimming through my mind.

Currently I am studying the Advanced Diploma of Building Design (Architectural) at TAFE. It is a great course, with a hefty workload with designs, reports, presentations and everything else in between. Classmates make it easy to get out of bed and attend class, and the teachers are helpful and informative.

For me to study this course, at the selected TAFE was no easy task. I spent a good 3 days going through the positives and negatives, what future can come out of the course, how much it would cost to study and the like. The reason I had to do a pro's and con's list because I was living in Melbourne at the time, and I applied for Wodonga TAFE and NMIT (Northern Melbourne Institute of TAFE) for the exact same course.

Some of the positives I found for doing the Wodonga TAFE course was it being close to family, my friends and football. The positives I found for NMIT was that it was just around the corner (so to speak, it was not really) from where I was living and I already had a job.

Negatives for Wodonga TAFE was the moving process and getting a new job. Whilst the negatives for NMIT was I eventually had to find a new house and housemates and the cost of living out of home.

I then discussed with friends about each one, and we came to the conclusion that studying in Wodonga was the better option, at the time. So I enrolled and everything was exciting. Our first project was designing a bathroom, and second was a renovation and extension to a heritage building. We have just started our third project, which is a new dwelling on a sloping site, and I really should be writing out my client contractual agreement form, instead, I am sharing my insights with everyone!

As soon as I moved back home and started studying, I realised I want to aim to be at the top of the profession, with that being Architect. Once I finish the TAFE course, which is 3 years, legally I can not call myself an architect, instead I am defined as a Building Designer. So, Ted Mosby, Building Designer, or Anthony Richardson, Building Designer, does not have the same ring to it.

Over the last couple months I have been toying with the idea of attending university in Melbourne to study architecture. However, it has been a matter of when to apply and how I can afford to study and live. I have been told the architecture degree is a very full-on course, more full-on than my current TAFE course. It is also very competitive to get into, and to be selected to do the Master of Architecture is even more cut-throat. So these are a couple set-backs.

With the way things are going at the moment, I will hold of applying for any university course until I complete my TAFE course. I did think about maybe applying for architecture at the end of the year, but maybe I need more time at TAFE to enhance my skills and knowledge. Plus, I get RPL's from the TAFE, so 1 1/2 years is shaved of my uni degree if I complete the TAFE course.

I did the maths one day and if I can complete my course, get into university, do my masters and do the 2 years work placement to become a registered architect, when I'm 30, I can introduce myself as, Anthony Richardson, Architect.

However, that is a lot of study, and a lot of university fees to be able to have that title. An architect's salary can be upwards of $100,000, but I have to look at and see if all the time studying and the cost of uni, will it be worth it in the end?

As a building designer, I can focus on residential projects and small commercial projects. I won't be doing any 70 storey skyscrapers, but there are a couple buildings I would love to design. I do want to design a bar/club, a golf club, a football club room (or basically all the buildings that go on a football ground), a mini-golf course, a restaurant (maybe a rib joint shaped like a cowboy hat) and I want to design a couple gyms. Looking at the types of buildings I want to design, the architecture degree isn't really needed, but a client may look at it and choose an architect over a building designer because of the title, Architect.

I still have 2 odd years to think about this, and whether I want to start designing and earn the dollars once I finish TAFE, or if I want to keep studying and earn big dollars down the track. I guess I could do work as a building designer whilst I am studying at uni, but the workload of both uni and work may become too much for my poor lil brain. At the moment, I will just continue being awesome in my TAFE course and have the thought of uni stored at the back of my mind.


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

My Very First Melbourne Job

This blog will be about the very first "job" I held while I was living in Melbourne in 2009. Looking back, this job was completely useless, however, at the time, I thought it was a dream come true. However, thanks to this jobs, I now know I am never doing them again, and I can spot the commission-based jobs in a paper or on the net.

My very first job I held in Melbourne was a telesales profession. It was a week before I was due to move, and I was getting frustrated with no phone calls for interviews or anything of the like. Then I saw a job for a telesales profession, you know them guys that ring you up during dinner and try and sell you crap? Yep, that job! The ad made it look like a great job, good pay, easy work, etc etc. So I applied, and then 3 hours later I get a email asking for a interview. With the job I was currently working as, as my 2nd only real job, I was pretty unknown when it came to the outside-of-Oaklands workings. So I took a day off, in my final week of work, to go to this interview in the heart of Melbourne CBD. The interview was very basic, and everyone got given a job, and at the time, I saw this as the greatest happening to me. I finally had a job for when I moved in a couple days! I was very excited and could not wait to move to Melbourne and start working and living the crazy lifestyle the city offers.

The morning of my very first day, I was excited. I borrowed my housemate's computer the night before to look up train and tram times, so I was ready when I walked out that front door....

I took a train into Flinders St, Monday morning, in peak hour. Prior to this trip, the only other time I have been in Melbourne by myself was for the interview, and the only other time I have been in Melbourne with a group was for a footy trip and for a couple doctor checkups. I was not prepared for the madness of the CBD during peak-hour. The streets were swarmed with people, people in suits, people in shirts and boardies, people in homeless outfits and people in crazy weirdo clothes. I had never really used Melbourne public transport system, so I did muddle up tram times and actual trams. I was scheduled to begin work at 9:30am, however, by the time I boarded the correct tram, it was already 9:28am! I was going to be late for my very first day! Whoopsy!

I finally arrived at the building, half-an-hour late, but I was keen to make up for lost time. They already started the training session where we were being briefed on the product (a.k.a, scam) we were trying to sell (a.k.a, trying to talk people in believing the crap). This was all very exciting, the call centre was on the 5th floor and was filled with, not to be racist, but it's my blog, your typical call-centre type person. This is no joke right here, but I was only white person in the entire centre! I don't know how many exactly there was, but I think there was about 7 or 8 of us attending the training.

After the morning session, we had a little lunch break, where I proceeded to search for a McDonalds for a nice cheeseburger. Now, for those who have been to Melbourne, you know just how easy it is to find a MickyD's in the CBD. There is basically a restaurant on every single corner in the entire, well, city! But for some reason, around where I was working, which by memory was St Kilda, on Albert Rd I think. I could not find a McDonalds. We were due back for more training at 1:30, and with the time being 1:20, I gave up my search and went back to the building where I cried a little bit on the inside.

Back into the hustle-and-bustle, which is the call-centre lifestyle. You walk into a call-centre room and the first thing you notice is, it is loud. It is a room filled with computers, and people at each computer, talking, all the time! It was not really my ideal setting, as I prefer the relaxed mood, casual thing, while this was tense and loud. The manager of the centre came into the training room and gave us a run-down on his "company" where he told us about his humble beginnings, and then he told us in about an hour we will be joining everyone out on the floor. This excited me a bit, as I wanted to just get out there on the phones and start selling!!

Finally the time arrived where we were able to hit the phones! We were given a script, which we read over and over. We were also given a 5 page booklet filled with phone numbers and names of the people we had to call. I was feeling good, I knew the product (*cough cough*) and always thought I was good with people. To this day, I still remember the very first conversation I had with my very first potential client.

*Ring Ring*
*Ring Ring*
*Ring Ring*
Customer - Hello
Me - Yes hello Mr Smith, I am calling from Trinity
Customer - Yes?
Me - Yes, now I have seen you can save money on your Telstra phone account
Customer - How do you know I'm with Telstra?
Me - Uhh, I don't I just....
Customer - Yeah how about you f**k off mate and stop ringing me, I am sick of you c**ts ringing me up, I have a business to run here, I don't need you f**kheads always calling me!
Me - Oh, I am sorry sir, I will.....
*Beep* *Beep* *Beep*

What a great insight to my future.

Looking back, I can see why he was so upset, but at the time, it shook me up, but I was ready to make up for it. So I spent the next couple hours on the phone calling clients, however, I could not talk someone into buying.

Now I mentioned earlier we started of with 7 or 8 people, by the end of lunch, there was 6 people, and the very next day, out of our group, we only had 3 people (including me). The second day was spent on the phone. I'm not going to bore you with details, but, I just could not sell this damn product! It was quite frustrating at the time, and it would have been helpful if I did sell, because I found out how the pay structure actually worked on my third and final day.

My final day arrived, whereas at the time, I just saw it as my third day. Back on the phones all day, and the group we started of with was down to me and another guy, everyone else high-tailed their way of it, which I should have done. It was around lunch time and the manager comes up to me and sits down beside me. He asks me why I haven't sold anything over the last couple days, and the best answer I could come up with was "I'm trying really hard" and he said "Well I don't think you, I have listened to a couple of your calls. You haven't made a single sale, so you have to leave" Yes, I just got fired! I was devastated!

As I was packing up my stuff, I asked about the money for the training. Wait, let me back up and tell you the pay structure the ad said

"$18.95/hr for training, with uncapped commission afterwards"

When I first read it, the week earlier, I saw it as $18/hr for training and for our job after training. But, at training they said you don't get a pay rate, but, you get paid on per sale you make. Now, when I was leaving, the manager said that I won't get paid for training because that $18/hr only comes to you when you have been working for the 3 month probation period. So the only way you could get the $18/hr was if you worked for 3 months, and at my rate, there was no chance of that happening.

So my first job in Melbourne, I made a whopping $0 and 0 cents. Looking back, you think I would have learnt my lesson, however, I still have some more Melbourne job stories to tell....


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

This Is Bought To You........

One of my biggest pet peeves in life, perhaps the biggest pet peeve in life, is when people incorrectly use the words "Bought" and "Brought". I will say, I do mix up the words 'done' and 'did', but that's not what this is about!

"I brought some chips from the shop"
"I bought it home"

NO! NO! NO!!

"I bought some chips from the shop"
"I brought it home"

Seriously, how hard is that! It is not very hard at all. It's simple English people, not that difficult. I am going to make sure I rid the world of this problem and correct every single person, every single time, until they start using bought and brought properly.

If a certain girl, who ALWAYS mixes this up, this is aim directly at you!! Yes, you!



From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

Funny Street Names

This blog post is inspired from the time I was living in Melbourne for a year. The year was 2009, having spent my past 20 years living in the small confines of Oaklands, I decided to break my comfort zone and move out of home. The first few weeks there was scary, I didn't know the area at all, and everybody was either a rapist, murder or a gangland icon. Then one fateful Thursday, while going for a jog down Waterdale Rd, I noticed a street sign. This street sign changed my life, and the weird thing was, it was the next street down from mine. I read the sign, and was like 'oh, ok' and then went to continue jogging, and I was like, "Wait, what did that say?" I looked back up, and sure enough, it was real. To me, this is the greatest street name in the history of street names, my dream is to own a house on this street.

The street sign read, Bonar St!

For proof it exists!

My life has never been the same since, in a good way. This has been the key foundation of a lot of jokes with my near-best friend from Melbourne, who actually lived on the corner of Bonar (hehe) St. So right now I am going to do some google mapping to find other funny, dirty street names.

As the kids of today say, brb



Dick St, Wodonga, VIC

Pussy Willow Court, Boulder, CO, United States

Boner St, Newark, OH, United States (I know we already have a Boner sounding street, but this is spelt differently)

Woolcock Ave, Kew East, VIC

Fanny St, Monnee Ponds, VIC


They are dirty sounding ones, now I am just going to browse the world for some unusual and weird ones


Anthony Street, Melbourne, VIC

Fuk Man Rd, Sai Kung, Hong Kong

Poo Parade, Wanganella, NSW

Awesome Again Lane, Aurora, Ontario, Canada



That is enough for now, some interesting streets I discovered. Well folks, stay tuned.


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

By Request...

Comes this blog entry. A fellow Crow at training requested I blog about my, well, totally awesome goal at training last night.

It was 5:30pm, raining and windy, when I decided to go down to the oval to warm up for training. You know, run a few laps, do shuttles, sprints, just a little warm up. Rest of the team started rocking up at 6ish and training was underway, with more laps and shuttles. But with me being tough, it was nothing to me. After some hand-ball drills and some lane work, it was time to head to the goals.

The drill started off as per usual, no biggie, people having shots at goals. Some scored, some missed, but I believe the overall atmosphere of the drill was low. The team needed a spark, and this is where I enter the story.

Leading towards the goal, my fellow team mate kicked it over my head, towards the boundary, forcing me to run hard to get the ball, but also putting me on a impossible (ha! impossible, no such thing) angle. With the rain belting down, wind almost sending me flying, I paddled the ball until I got a good bounce up to grab hold. Without even thinking I put it on my boot, left foot, left side of the goals, a vertical floating barrel, soaring right through the middle of the big sticks!

The team was now sparked by the effort, the determination, the poise, the overall skill of the one. This goal will forever go down in history as the best goal at Crows 2s footy training on a Tuesday night. The goal had everything, adverse weather conditions, a terrible set-up kick, a snap shot, and a goal.

So Dazza, this blog is for you, hope you enjoyed reliving that special moment, I'm sure you will never forget it.


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

The Truth Is Out There!

[X-Files music playing in the background throughout entire blog post]

During my mid-teenage years, I was interested in UFOs, aliens, big foot, Bermuda Triangle and all them kinds of, crazy, out-there, things. I will admit, I did believe to see a UFO, however, it may have been a plane in the night sky. I did also experience a event while sleeping, where I felt I was being lifted out-of-bed and upon waking up, fell straight down into my bed, however, this may have been a dream.

At the time of writing this exact sentence, the time is 8:33pm, which means it is nothing but black skies outside. If you look up at the night sky, what do you see? Planets and stars. You google some images of space, and in some pictures, our galaxy is seen to be only the size of a grain of sand. So when you think about it, the universe is so massive, it has to be impossible to even think just how large it is exactly.

Planet earth is one of a kind, it supports all sorts of lifeforms from frogs to alligators, sharks to butterflies, humans to Justin Beiber. It is amazing this planet is able to sustain all the life form for the some billion years or so. Even just looking at the evolution of man, from caveman to the Ancient Egyptians to the 1700s to the modern day.

The point I am trying to make, these days I do not believe in little green men, or grey big headed big eyed aliens. However, I find it impossible for Earth to be the only planet having life form on it.

The image below isn't exactly the photo I was talking about earlier. However it does show just how small we are in the grand scheme of things.

You can not tell me we are the only living life form out there! Looking at that photo, it has to be impossible, within all that space, we are alone. Sure they may not be green men with lazers, but who knows what they could be. Maybe simple bacteria, or maybe a cross between a elephant and a donkey, in the colour pink and green.

Sure it is easy to say anyone who believes in aliens and UFOs are crazy. But, it is also crazy to think Earth is the only habitable planet in the entire universe!! Look at the big picture, or easier, look at the above picture again, look away, and look again. Repeat 7 times, get this image burned into your brain, and think long and hard about the image and what is truly represents. Is your mind blown?

Stay tuned for more blog posts like this, as I have a few floating around in this brain of mine.

From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

When I Grow Up.....

As a child, everyone has that one profession they want. Most popular ones being firefighter, doctor, lawyer and professional athlete. Why are these most popular? I don't know exactly but if I was to provide a brief possible answer, I would say...

Firefighter because they fight fires and save lives.
Doctors because they save lives.
Lawyer because they are seen to be rich.
Pro athlete because they are sport stars.

When I was growing up, even during my teenage years, I went through many phases of what I wanted to be when I grow up. At 22 years of age, I am still not "grown up" but looking back, I both laugh and feel heartbroken at some of the dreams I had.

My first career I wanted to pursue was being a vet. This was when I was about 6-7 years old, and I loved animals. I use to keep pet ants (well an ant-farm), drop-tail lizards and bugs. I loved dogs and cats, but also the non-domestic animals such as tigers and sharks. I watched TV and saw some animals suffering on a show, and I knew then I wanted to be a vet to help save these lives of the poor animals. However, this dream only last a month.

When I hit my teenage years, I started being "extreme" in the sports I participated in. This included skateboarding, bmxing and rollerblading. The first one I got into was skateboard, and I would spend hours outside riding around and falling over, but I enjoyed it and I still remember the moment I wanted to "be a skateboarder" I was watching tv and flicked over to ESPN where the X-Games were being played. The event was skateboard vert ramp best trick, and Tony Hawk was attempting the 900. If it wasn't for the commentators, I would have had no idea he was attempting to make skateboard history. After many, many attempts, he finally completed a 900, and the same time made history. I raced out to see my mum and I told her "I want to be a skateboarder, can you buy me a board please?" So the following week we went into the local town and she bought me a skateboard, it only had 1 kicktail on it, but I was pumped. Anyhoo, long story short, that dream failed when I realised I sucked at skateboarding.

BMX was next in line where I got my first, and only, bike for Christmas. I was slightly better at BMX than skateboard, but still no where near good enough to go professional at it. Then after watching Brink, a movie about rollerblading, this was the next Big Dream of mine. I bought a new pair of "blades" and hit the streets hard. I could do all sorts of tricks, like jump, grabs, 180s, 360s, jumps of stairs, I was a pro at this sport! Things were looking up for me, then, out of no where, I got bored of it.

The next dream almost became a reality, several times, and this dream had several variations. I was born with severe health problems (all this will be told later) and as a child, my mum was quite protective me. This limited my involvement in physical games and sports. Then when my mum passed away, I was 15, and wanted to improve my health and fitness, so I began working out. In a short month, this led to me wanting to be a Personal Trainer. Now, you think of the stereotypical trainer, and you would see tall and muscular, I was quite the opposite, well, still am, being short and skinny. However, I did not let this deter me, I spent hours reading magazines, articles online and the like. I applied for TAFE to study the Cert III & IV in Fitness, but did not follow through with it. I then found a online course in which I could become a qualified Strength & Conditioning Coach, which was I wanted. My dream, or goal, was to someday train the North Melbourne Football Club. I signed up for the course and they mailed me about booklets, a textbook and regular contact via email. This was motivating, however, being in a rural community, I was unable to complete it, so I put this on the backburner. Rewind to 2008, I decided I wanted to go to uni to study Exercise and Sport Science in Melbourne. However, I did not get a offer for the course, so after one more attempt to finish my S&C course but was lazy, I gave up on the dream. I also wanted to study and become a physiotherapist. It still sits in the back of my mind, and it is always possible to go back to it.

Even though I am not seen as a gifted athlete, I did have the dream of someday being a professional long jumper. I considered myself half decent at the sport during high school, and tried to coach myself at the event. However, I found out it is impossible to coach yourself at that sport, and then another dream was shattered. I re-visited this dream a couple years after high school but found I lost my mojo at the event.

After my hopes of being a strength and conditioning ended, I did not have a clue what I wanted to do when I grew up. Then I thought back to when I was doing some gardening/landscape work for a local person when I was younger. I found the job both rewarding and fun, and was great to see some hard work paid off. Then I googled some landscaping apprenticeships and I thought to myself, I needed to be realistic. My body could not handle the hardship of being a landscaper, so the next best thing was, if I can't build it, I'll design it. So landscape architecture was my thing, and after talking to a few professionals and a career advisor, I decided to switch over to buildings. The reason being, landscape architecture is a very competitive field as there is not many jobs out on the market.

So here I was, 21 years old, it was November last year, and I was on the VTAC website looking at my current preferences. My preferences being physiotherapist, sport science and health science. And within 3 minutes it all changed to building design and architecture.

Right now I am currently studying Building Design, and loving it. I have thoughts of moving to an architecture degree afterwards, but then again, who knows what can happen. I sometimes find it difficult to digest the thought of being in the one career for my entire life. I mean, with so much life to live, why spend it all on the one thing?


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times

That One Story

We all have that one story, that one story in which we can not escape from. That one story that haunts our life forever. That one story, upon re-telling it, never gets old. That one story that gets told at your 21st. This post, is, That One Story.


The year was 1995 (I think), yours truely was a happy 7 year old kid, embarking on the family holiday to sunny Queensland. Everything was going great, the beach, the sun, the AMUSEMENT PARKS!!! They were the highlight for me, all the rides, all the lollies, the cool little toys like dolphins on a surfboard. It was a great family trip, we all had fun, and forged a lifetime worth of memories. Sadly, I was involved in one of them lifetime memories.

I forget where the main story unfolds, but let's just say Queensland for the heck of it. But geez, where to begin with this story.....

I was inside watching tv, and the older kids and adults were out on the patio talking amongst themselves. I don't know what the conversations were about, but probably about wallets and stamps. Now, everyone, and I mean everyone, gets that feeling when you are brewing something shocking, and you want to share it with the world. This feeling swept my body like the waves at high tide, and I had to "show" everyone.

Being a young, care-free, seven year old, I raced outside to where everyone was sitting, and blurted out the quote that would forever haunt me...

"Hey everyone, listen to my fart!....... OH NO!!"

Which then I proceeded to rush, no not rush, belted, dashed, sprinted, whatever word you use, if I was up against Usian Bolt and a toliet was at the finish line, he would be eating my dust! And god I hope it would be only my dust he would be eating.

So there it is, I wanted to impress everyone with my tremendous fart I had brewing, only for it to be shattered. Let us not deny it, we all have had this moment in our life. Where you don't know whether it will be a fart or a poo, but we let it rip anyway. It shows you are bold and risk-taking. I only wish I had my moment in the privacy of a bathroom and not on the patio surrounded by family and friends.


From The One They Call Anthony, This Is The Life And Times